14 Dating Truths Only Girls With Acne Get
1. Some of your makeup will sweat off during sex. Unless you’re having dainty, no-passionate-face-touching sex in an igloo, things will get hot. And your setting spray can only do so much. The sooner you realize that your partner isn't exactly examining your every pore when you're both naked and highly turned on, the sooner you can enjoy stress-free sex.
2. But still, take off everything on your face before bed. The temptation to leave on your foundation and make him think you really did wake up like this is strong. I get it. But aside from the satanic sweat-makeup combo that will for sure clog your pores to hell, leaving on makeup ages you horribly in the long run. The cool-girl aesthetic is not worth it! Nothing is!
3. Going bare for the first time is kind of a big deal. Yeah ... despite knowing you need to wipe off that concealer, the risk of rejection feels like it outweighs everything else. But when you finally do it, it really does feel like its very own relationship milestone, especially if they do some cute shit like kiss your forehead. And of course, people worth dating won't treat this with the same great ceremony that you do because it doesn't and shouldn't matter to them.
4. Having sex in the dark is liberating but you can’t do it forever. As sexy as ~mood lighting~ à la one lone candle is, it gets sooooo boring after the 17th time. Not to mention, it puts on a damper on a relationship if you feel like you have to hide all the time.
5. Strategically turning your body during sex so they see less of your acne/bacne does not work! A one-night stand probably won’t mention it or even notice, but a long-term partner worth dating will tell you that, duh, they know you have some scarring, but they DGAF and just want to try doggy for once.
6. You will feel a rage like never before when you see a guy have perfect, Renaissance-statue-like skin while sleeping in the same unwashed sheets for months. And then you’ll realize, Wait, I’m sleeping in the grodiest bed rn, and hightail out of there with your 12 cleansers, pronto. Genetic luck on his end doesn’t cancel out the fact that he’s literally filthy in bed.
7. You’ll feel relief when a guy totally gets the acne struggle. Whether he was on Accutane in high school or currently deals with some painful cystic MFs on his lower back, being able to openly vent about how annoying acne is bonds you like nothing else.
8. Ban anyone who gives you unsolicited and profoundly dumb skin-care advice. Yes, I drink enough water and wash my face with the stuff, even! GOOD THE FUCK BYE.
9. In fact, you learn not to listen to most people. After a certain point, you stop trying every weird piece of advice people with blessedly well-behaved pores tell you. They’re not doctors and even dermatologists get it wrong sometimes! This can (and should) also double for relationship advice as well - people just don’t know that much about what works for you.
10. Birth control will probably either help or mess up your skin, and it’s not vain to try a few different ones until you’re happy. Every hormonal method is a special cocktail that your body will react to in a certain way. It can actually clear up your skin or create a fresh line of clogged pores along your jaw. Track how you feel and don’t just settle for the first one you try!
11. No attractive man has ever made one of those awful “take her swimming on the first date” memes. The guy slumped over his laptop ranting about how women always trick men with their contouring witchcraft probs doesn’t resemble Chris Hemsworth. Boy, bye.
"Take her swimming on the first date." GIRL take him shaving on the first date.
- Trixie Mattel (@trixiemattel) July 8, 2017
12. You will have Good Skin Days and Slightly Less Good Skin Days and WTF THIS FACE MASK ACTUALLY MADE THINGS WORSE Days, and the right person will love you through all of them. A well-adjusted partner who doesn’t expect you to look like a celebrity with access to $1,200 skincare products will get that sometimes your period royally ruins your life. They’ll tell you you’re beautiful but also completely get why you got teary in the bathroom.
13. Having acne can make you a better partner too. At least you'll never make entire judgments about people’s health or cleanliness based on appearances. You know better after being the most hygienic human you know and people still treating you like you don’t know what soap is.
14. You may look younger longer. ...I just learned this now. People with acne might have special protective caps on their chromosomes that are linked to delaying aging. Adult acne, you can stay. (JK, you will always be here anyway. But we’re good now.)
Follow Julia on Twitter.
You Might Also Like
