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These 50 Quotes From "Don't Look Up" Are Just TOO Good

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7 min read

The Netflix original Don't Look Up is 132 minutes of pure political satire. The movie might make you laugh at moments, but the message it shares with the audience is no laughing matter. Here are the best 50 quotes from the movie. They might make you laugh...or maybe end up being some food for thought.

Tyler Perry, Scott Stuber, Jennifer Lawrence, Tomer Sisley, Leonardo DiCaprio, Meryl Streep, Jonah Hill, Himesh Patel, Kid Cudi, Adam McKay, Ron Perlman, Kira Goldberg, Kevin Messick, and Paul Guilfoyle attend the "Don't Look Up" World Premiere
Michael Ostuni / Patrick McMullan via Getty Images

1.General Themes: "Yeah, we call him Teddy 'cause he ain't no Teddy Bear."

A scene from the movie
Netflix

2.Randall Mindy: "This isn't happening, right? Kate, this isn't real, right? This is just some sort of alternate reality, right? Say something."

Kate Dibiasky: "I got to get high."

3.General Themes: "I have to be in Okinawa by 2 o'clock tomorrow. I have to go quell the natives."

Randall Mindy screaming
Netflix

4.Peter Isherwell: "Are you sure the video of the puppy on the rooster is optimizing our prepubescent sense memory consumer sector? I find the bird quite threatening."

5.President Orlean: "I hear there's an asteroid or comet or something that you don't like the looks of. Tell me about it, and then tell me why you are telling me about it."

Meryl Streep as President Orlean
Netflix

6.Randall Mindy: "How is it criminal if we just tell people, like the public, you know, what we saw and tell them the truth?"

Adul: "Make sure this one gets media training before he hits the shows."

7.President Orlean: "You cannot go around telling people that there is a 100% chance that they're gonna die."

Meryl Streep as President Orlean
Netflix

8.Kate Dibiasky: "The snacks are free."

Teddy Oglethorpe: "What?"

Kate Dibiasky: "The general, he charged us for the snacks. But they're free."

Randall Mindy: "Oh, gosh."

Kate Dibiasky: "Why on earth would he do that?"

9.President Orlean: "OK, let's bottom line this. What is it gonna cost me? What is the ask here?"

Meryl Streep at the World Premiere Of Netflix's "Don't Look Up"
Michael Ostuni / Patrick McMullan via Getty Images

10.Child: "May I ask something Mr. Isherwell?"

Peter Isherwell: "No."

11.Jason Orlean: "I can't even think of another president that I'd ever wanna see in Playboy."

A scene from the movie
Netflix

12.Phillip: "She asked you if you were a lesbian. She did not say that you were a lesbian. It was a question."

Kate: "Hey, look, can I sit down with your mom to have lunch in like seven months?"

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Phillip: "Seven. That's weirdly specific and distant. This is my mom."

13.Dr. Oglethorpe: "Social media is just going on and on about that singer Riley Bina and DJ Chello breaking up. That's just too bad. They seem like sweet kids."

Netflix / Via tenor.com

Randall Mindy: "I don't know them. It's a shame though. Do you know them, Kate?"

Kate Dibiasky: "Yes. But I don't really give a shit right now."

Randall Mindy: "Oh."

14.Kate Dibiasky: "Are you kidding? You want to see my f***ing SAT scores?"

15.Kate Dibaisky: Are we really about to tell the President of the United States that we have just over six months until humankind, basically every species is completely extinct?"

Jennifer Lawrence as Kate

Randall Mindy: "Yeah, that's exactly what we are about to do, yeah."

Netflix

16.President Orlean: "The timing is just, it's atrocious. OK, at this very moment, I say we sit tight and assess."

Jason Orlean: "Sit tight and assess."

17.Randall Mindy: "I just feel this isn't what I do. No?"

Randall and Kate looking at their phones

Dr. Olgethorpe: "You're just telling a story. Keep it simple. No math."

Randall: "But it's all math."

Netflix

18.Randall: "We heard about your breakup too. So we just want to say we're very sorry. Right? We're real sorry. You seem like a great person."

Riley Bina: "Why don't you mind your own business, you old f***?"

19.Riley Bina: "You guys discovered a comet? That's so dope. I have a tattoo of a shooting star on my back."

A scene from the movie
Netflix

20.Kate Dibiasky: "I'm sorry. Are we not being clear? We're trying to tell you that the entire planet is about to be destroyed."

Jack Bremmer: "OK."

Brie Evantee: "Well, it's, you know, it's something we do around here. We just keep the bad news light."

21.Jack Bremmer: "The entire planet. OK, well, as it's damaging, will it hit this one house, in particular, that's right on the coast of New Jersey? It's my ex-wife's house. I need it to be here. Can we make that happen?"

A scene from the movie
Netflix

22.Brie Evantee: "A spoonful of Xanax makes the medicine go down, right?"

23.Randall Mindy: "Yeah, she's the head of NASA. But look, she's a former anesthesiologist and a President Orlean super donor. It's all corrupt."

Kate and Mindy looking surprised
Netflix

24.Randall Mindy: "I think that's photoshopped, Kate."

25.Kate: "Well, maybe the destruction of the entire planet isn't supposed to be fun. Maybe it's supposed to be terrifying and unsettling. And you should stay up all night, every night crying, when we're all 100% for sure going to f***ing die!"

A scene from the movie
Netflix

26.Brie Evantee: "Well, the handsome astronomer can come back anytime. But the yelling lady, not so much."

27.Randall Mindy: "What do these trillions of dollars matter if we're all going to die with the impact of this comet?"

Leonardo DiCaprio and Jennifer Lawrence at the World Premiere Of Netflix's "Don't Look Up"
Michael Ostuni / Patrick McMullan via Getty Images

28.Randall Mindy: "We really did have everything, didn't we? I mean, when you think about it."

29.Kate Dibiasky: "The truth is way more depressing. They are not even smart enough to be as evil as you're giving them credit for."

A scene from the movie
Netflix

30.Randall Mindy: "Not everything needs to sound so goddamn clever or charming or likable all the time. Sometimes we need to just be able to say things to one another. We need to hear things."

31.Randall Mindy: "Everything is theoretically impossible until it is done."

A scene from the movie
Netflix

32.Kate Dibiasky: "I have news for you. It’s already a complete disaster."

33.Randall Mindy: "We’re gonna get the news out there, one way or another."

Actor Leonardo DiCaprio attends Netflix's "Don't Look Up" World Premiere
Mike Coppola / Getty Images

34.Randall Mindy: "This is the worst news in the history of humanity."

35.Randall Mindy: "When did you do those calculations?"

Jennifer Lawrence at the World Premiere Of Netflix's "Don't Look Up"

Kate Dibiasky: "I put the moment of impact on a diet app. So, impact is when my diet ends. Only I'm not on a diet. I'm just crying five times a day."

Michael Ostuni / Patrick McMullan via Getty Images

36.Randall Mindy: "Right, well, the President of the United States. Is fucking. Lying! Look I'm just like all of you. I hope to god, I hope to… God that this president knows what she's doing. I hope she's got us all taken care of, but the truth is… I think this whole administration has completely. Lost. Their fucking mind! And I think. We're all. Gonna die!"

37.Benedict Drask: "You ever see inside a man's torso?"

A scene from the movie
Netflix

38.Jason Orlean: "There's dope stuff, like material stuff, like sick apartments and watches, and cars, um, and clothes and shit that could all go away, and I don't wanna see that stuff go away. So I'm gonna say a prayer for that stuff. Amen."

39.Yule: "Oh, I fucking love fingerling potatoes."

A scene from the movie
Netflix

40.Jason Orlean: "What's up, y'all? I'm the last man on Earth. Shit's all f***ed up. Don't forget to like and subscribe. We out here."

41.Kate Dibiasky: "I am grateful we tried."

A scene from the movie
Netflix

42.Teddy Oglethorpe: "A man's always got choices. Sometimes you just gotta choose the good ones."

43.Kate Dibiasky: "Unless you assholes are taking me to the bat cave, f**k you for putting this hood on me."

A scene from the movie
Netflix

44.President Orlean: "Washington always has to have a hero."

45.Jason Orlean: "And we are supposed to trust you? The comet's got your name."

Jonah Hill at the World Premiere Of Netflix's "Don't Look Up"
Michael Ostuni / Patrick McMullan via Getty Images

46.Random person at the bar: "We’re people just like you. We deserve to know."

47.Kate Dibiasky: "I just despise the 'getting to know you' parts of relationships."

  Netflix
Netflix

48.Brie Evantee: "Why did you do that? I really liked you, and I despise most people."

49.Politician: "They want you to look up because they are looking down their noses on you."

  Netflix
Netflix

50.Mrs. Mindy: "I guess I’ll just tell our sons your dad is f**king the lady on television."

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