Ariana Grande and Pete Davidson Were Too Much Too Soon, and So Were We
I spent the night collecting myself. Like most tragedies, you should take time to reflect. Collect. Remember. I turned on the oft-forgot James Ingram classic from 1994, “Just Once,” and bathed in the richness of its opening lines, “I did my best / But I guess my best wasn’t good enough.” Pete Davidson and Ariana Grande had done their best. But Pete Davidson and Ariana Grande had broken off their engagement.
I’ll admit that the pairing didn’t make sense at first. Ariana, a shining pop star who just happened to dress like she’s about to watch Recess on a Saturday morning, and Pete, a guy who looks like he’s about to overcharge a group of teens for some granddaddy purp mixed with oregano. But as the days went by, their coupling felt more authentic. Then it happened: the proposal. They jumped into what became a trend this dizzying summer. They were 2 Fast 2 Marry.
But then I took a moment, turned off James Ingram, and asked myself: why is this my business? I have thoughts about getting engaged after two months (Bieber/Baldwin, Chopra/Jonas), but also it's not my relationship. TMZ reported that Grande hit the brink after her former boyfriend, Mac Miller, fatally overdosed this summer, and doesn't that feel like a painfully personal fact we shouldn't know? I'm not trying to write my way out of a job, but there's such a thing as rooting for a couple, and then there's something about flying too close to their orbit.
I know that people love a good storyline just as much as Hollywood loves speedy engagements and quick turnaround relationships. We want the details: Why did Grande move Davidson into her apartment and purchase a pig? Why is there a strange religious undertone to Bieber and Baldwin's relationship? Why was Quantico cancelled? In short, it's not our business (except Quantico. Literally, ABC. Why was Quantico cancelled?) In an age where we spend so much of our time on our phones, reading about every morsel of information afforded to us, are the inner workings of being unnervingly human in the public eye something we need to know about?
In the words of an Ariana-Grande-adjacent source that spoke to People about the breakup, "It was way too much too soon." The quote is clearly about the time of the relationship, but maybe it also applies to us, too. We see a celebrity headline, and we fan the hell out of that flame like we're on some survival reality show. We want to know the details and the details of the details, and then we're surprised when the relationship is expedited before inevitably burning out. Maybe we're also a little too much, too soon.
To shoot you straight for a minute, joke-free, I walk to the subway every day to go to work. Some days, I'm in a terrible mood. I have an argument with someone or I spill coffee on myself or I just woke up like a real asshole. No one looks at me. No one assesses my motives for standing instead of sitting. That's not so for Ariana and Pete. Call me old fashioned, but I think everyone should be able to take a girl/guy out to the Olive Garden a few times, consider your quirks and their quirks on their own timeline, and meet Bill Clinton without the hubbub of having it scrutinized.
I turned back to James Ingram, as one is wont to do amid heartbreak, and I listened again, "Can we find a way to finally make it right? / Make the magic last for more than just one night?" Ugh, the deep cuts of '90s R&B are so real. But those questions aren't mine to answer. Ariana, Pete, if you're reading this: try out James Ingram. It's incredibly melodramatic. And when you're ready, I hope the transition to whatever comes with no tears left to cry.
('You Might Also Like',)
