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NY Post

Bette Midler and her husband have slept in ‘separate bedrooms’ for 40 years

Stephanie Webber
3 min read
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You bet.

Bette Midler’s secret to her 40-year marriage to husband Martin von Haselberg is simple — they just go to bed alone. The actress revealed that the couple have slept in “separate bedrooms” since tying the knot in Las Vegas on Dec. 16, 1984.

The reason? “My husband snores,” she told Entertainment Tonight while promoting “The Fabulous Four” on Thursday.

The pair exchanged vows after only dating for six weeks.

Bette Midler and Martin von Haselberg during Swifty Lazar Oscar Party at Spago’s Restaurant in Hollywood. Ron Galella Collection via Getty Images
Bette Midler and Martin von Haselberg during Swifty Lazar Oscar Party at Spago’s Restaurant in Hollywood. Ron Galella Collection via Getty Images
Martin von Haselberg and Bette Midler at the premiere of “Hocus Pocus 2” held at AMC Lincoln Square on September 27, 2022 in New York City. Variety via Getty Images
Martin von Haselberg and Bette Midler at the premiere of “Hocus Pocus 2” held at AMC Lincoln Square on September 27, 2022 in New York City. Variety via Getty Images

“I am very impulsive,” she told Hoda Kotb and Jenna Bush Hager earlier this month on how quickly their relationship moved. “We went to Vegas and got married by an Elvis impersonator, always a good idea.”

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“I knew immediately that Martin was outrageous when I first met him,” Midler also noted to journalist Elisa Leonelli. “I liked the fact that he was not afraid to be different, that he was an outsider like I am, that he was not complacent, that he stood aside from the mainstream.”

Bette Midler and Martin von Haselberg met in 1984 and married after six weeks. Ron Galella Collection via Getty Images
Bette Midler and Martin von Haselberg met in 1984 and married after six weeks. Ron Galella Collection via Getty Images
Bette Midler and Martin von Haselberg celebrating the release of “Mondo Beyondo” at Palette Restaurant in LA. Ron Galella Collection via Getty Images
Bette Midler and Martin von Haselberg celebrating the release of “Mondo Beyondo” at Palette Restaurant in LA. Ron Galella Collection via Getty Images
Bette Midler and Martin von Haselberg attend the 2012 Doris C. Freedman Award Ceremony in New York on May 16, 2012. WireImage
Bette Midler and Martin von Haselberg attend the 2012 Doris C. Freedman Award Ceremony in New York on May 16, 2012. WireImage

The couple are parents of daughter Sophie von Haselberg, who appears alongside her famous mom and co-stars Susan Sarandon, Sheryl Lee Ralph and Megan Mullally in the new comedy.

“I was more than averse [to let her go into acting]. I was frightened for her, and she was just a little girl,” Midler told ET. “I made a terrible mistake by saying, ‘If you go into show business, I’ll kill you.’ And she took it very much to heart. She’s brilliant. She’s great. She’s the love of my life.”

As for her longtime partner, Midler and the artist have also remained close due to “listening” and “compromise.”

Bette Midler stars in “The Fabulous Four.” AP
Bette Midler stars in “The Fabulous Four.” AP
Susan Sarandon, Megan Mullally, Sheryl Lee Ralph and Bette Midler in a scene from “The Fabulous Four.” AP
Susan Sarandon, Megan Mullally, Sheryl Lee Ralph and Bette Midler in a scene from “The Fabulous Four.” AP

“It’s best to pick your fights wisely and just meditate. Stay calm,” the “Hocus Pocus” actress told People in 2014.

“Don’t go from zero to 60 in two seconds. Just stay calm and try to breathe. Don’t diminish each other. Don’t make each other less. Don’t try to make each other wrong all the time. Don’t blame. Stop assigning blame,” she went on. “The blaming, I think, is the worst part. It’s so [easy to do], because you don’t want to carry the burden yourself. You want to push it onto someone else. But honestly, you have to learn not to do that.”

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