Billie Lourd talks balancing grief, motherhood: 'The magical moments can also be the hardest'
Billie Lourd, who lost her late mother Carrie Fisher six years ago, is embracing the bittersweetness of living with grief.
In an Instagram post Tuesday, the "Ticket to Paradise" star shared a sweet throwback photo of herself and Fisher on the six-year anniversary of Fisher's death and reflected on her experience of grief as a mother.
"It has been 6 years since my Momby died (feels like 2 but also like 705 at the same time?). And unlike most other years since she’s died, this year, these past two weeks have been some of the most joyful of my life," wrote Lourd, who welcomed daughter Jackson on Dec. 12. "Giving birth to my daughter and watching my son meet her have been two of the most magical moments I have ever experienced. But with the magic of life tends to come the reality of grief."
Lourd reflected on the fact that "my mom is not here to meet either of them" and "isn't here to experience any of the magic."
"All I can do is hold onto the magic harder, hug my kids a little tighter," Lourd continued. "Tell them a story about her. Share her favorite things with them. Tell them how much she would have loved them."
Lourd concluded her post by reminding her followers that "sometimes the magical moments can also be the hardest."
"For anyone out there experiencing the reality of grief alongside the magic of life, I see you. You are not alone," she wrote. "Don’t ignore either. Life can be magical and griefy at the same time."
Lourd shares newborn daughter Jackson with husband Austen Rydell. The couple welcomed a son, Kingston, in September 2020.
Lourd's mother Fisher, best known for her role as Princess Leia from the "Star Wars" franchise, died of "sleep apnea and other undetermined factors" on Dec. 27, 2016, following a lengthy flight from London to Los Angeles. Fisher was hospitalized for four days after she fell ill on a United Airlines flight a few days earlier.
An autopsy report later revealed the 60-year-old actress had a combination of drugs, including cocaine, heroin and ecstasy, in her system at the time of her death, though the coroner's office was unable to determine exactly what role the drugs played in Fisher’s death.
This isn’t the first time Lourd has opened up about grieving the death of her mother. In an Instagram post from December 2019, she shared an old photo of herself with Fisher and grandmother Debbie Reynolds, who died a day after Fisher on Dec. 28, 2016.
"Feel all the feelings - the good and the not so good. Eat something delish they used to love. Put on one of their favorite songs,” Lourd wrote at the time. "Be kind and patient with yourself. Don’t grieve in silence."
Surprise!Billie Lourd and Austen Rydell welcome baby boy Kingston Fisher
Billie Lourd remembers Carrie Fisher and Debbie Reynolds, shares message for those grieving
Contributing: Bryan Alexander and Rasha Ali, USA TODAY
This article originally appeared on USA TODAY: Billie Lourd talks grieving Carrie Fisher amid 'magic' of motherhood
