Jada, Meryl & the Debatable Logic Behind Choosing Amicable Separations Over a Legal Divorce


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After years of frequent candid admissions about the inner workings of their marriage, it was easy to assume that there was nothing we didn’t know about Will Smith and Jada Pinkett-Smith’s 26 year union. But perhaps the most surprising revelation about their marriage was that, since 2016, there has been no marriage at all — at least not in the romantic sense.

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Ahead of the release of her memoir, Worthy, Pinkett-Smith told Hoda Kotb on Today that she and the King Richard actor have been living “completely separate lives” for seven years all while continuing to attend public events together and with their two children, Willow and Jaden, and Smith’s son, Trey.

Trey Smith, Willow Smith, Jaden Smith, Will Smith and Jada Pinkett Smith at the premiere of Apple Original Films' "Emancipation" held at Regency Village Theatre on November 30, 2022 in Los Angeles, California. (Photo by Michael Buckner/Variety via Getty Images)
Trey Smith, Willow Smith, Jaden Smith, Will Smith and Jada Pinkett Smith at the premiere of Apple Original Films' "Emancipation" held at Regency Village Theatre on November 30, 2022 in Los Angeles, California. (Photo by Michael Buckner/Variety via Getty Images)

Then, as if spurred on by Pinkett-Smith’s confession, Meryl Streep’s representatives piped up to reveal that she too has been separated from her husband, Don Gummer, and living apart since 2017.

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In a statement, representatives for the Oscar winner and her sculptor husband of 45 years wrote that “while they will always care for each other, they have chosen lives apart.” The couple share four children and five grandchildren.

After a summer of bitter celebrity divorces, tense custody battles and many a cheating allegation, Streep and Pinkett-Smith’s half-baked “conscious uncouplings” seemed oddly refreshing and yet still entirely bewildering.

While other celebrities have taken a similar path over the years with secret breakups and delayed divorce announcements, when two A-list couples who have been tactical in all aspects of their careers take an almost identical approach to their marriage breakdowns, it’s hard not to wonder if there is some kind of strategy at play.

Nicole Sodoma, divorce attorney and author of marriage advice book Please Don’t Say You’re Sorry, broke down some of the pros, cons and motives behind this new celebrity separation trend and told exactly what goes on behind the scenes of an arrangement like Streep’s and Pinkett-Smith’s.

“By choosing permanent separation over divorce, they can maintain a degree of privacy, preventing the public from knowing about their separate living arrangements,” Sodoma told us adding that not jumping straight into a legal divorce can help exes prioritize “an amicable and thoughtful separation process.”

Sodoma tells us that there is also a financial advantage to these arrangements. “Staying married while living separately can also provide certain tax advantages. Couples might benefit from lower tax rates and deductions they would lose upon divorce, making it a financially strategic choice for some,” Sodoma notes.

As we’ve seen with many celebrity splits in time gone by, disputes over finances are part and parcel in any divorce involving some of the richest people in the world.

Just this summer, Kevin Costner went head-to-head with his ex-wife Christine Baumgartner while she fought to secure a large payout after filing for divorce from the Yellowstone actor in May. This marked Costner’s second expensive divorce battles with his $80 million payout to his first wife being dubbed one of the most costly Hollywood splits of all time.

SANTA MONICA, CALIFORNIA - FEBRUARY 27: Kevin Costner (R) and Christine Baumgartner attend the 28th Annual Screen Actors Guild Awards at Barker Hangar on February 27, 2022 in Santa Monica, California. (Photo by Jeff Kravitz/FilmMagic)
SANTA MONICA, CALIFORNIA - FEBRUARY 27: Kevin Costner (R) and Christine Baumgartner attend the 28th Annual Screen Actors Guild Awards at Barker Hangar on February 27, 2022 in Santa Monica, California. (Photo by Jeff Kravitz/FilmMagic)

With a precedent like this in Hollywood, are Streep, Gummer, Pinkett-Smith, and Smith playing with fire by not splitting up their assets within a legal framework? Sodoma tells us that there is a financial risk to separating but not legally divorcing.

“When legally separated but still married, creditors may come after both spouses for any debts incurred by either party,” she says. “This shared liability can be a significant drawback, especially if one spouse accumulates significant debts. In the event of financial disputes or loans between separated spouses, it can be challenging to recover money owed. The absence of a clear legal framework can make it harder to enforce financial obligations.”

Streep and Gummer have yet to comment directly on their split but Pinkett-Smith has insisted that she and Smith have no intention of ending their marriage on paper. She told Kotb that she “made a promise that there will never be a reason for us to get a divorce,” explaining, “We will work through … whatever.”

While working through “whatever” does leave the exes vulnerable to a legal minefield, Sodoma emphasizes that the choice to separate or divorce is an entirely personal one.

“Seeking legal advice when considering separation or divorce is often necessary to navigate complexities like asset division and child support,” she concludes. “Each situation is unique, and there is no one-size-fits-all approach, but open communication, empathy, and a clear understanding of the legal and financial aspects are key factors in managing these difficult life transitions.”

Before you go, click here to see the longest celebrity divorces that took years to get finalized.

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