As A Man In An Interracial Marriage, I Have Some Thoughts About Elemental

I’m a very lucky man. Besides having two wonderful children, and a loving wife, I’m also lucky that it all came together so smoothly. And, I only say that because I’m Black, my wife is Filipino, and my children are mixed. Here’s the cool thing: 9.9 times out of 10, I’d say that most people are super accepting of our mixed family.

So, being that I’ve been in an interracial relationship for nearly 20 years now, you might think that I’d be super happy that we now have a movie like Elemental, which got pretty good reviews. Here’s a film (from Pixar, no less) that’s all about accepting people’s differences, and also acts as an allegory for interracial dating.

But, I was actually really hesitant to see it. I think it’s because I thought it was going to focus on some of the uglier sides of human behavior. That said, I’m happy to say that I loved the movie, and why, like our very own Dirk Libbey, wish Elemental did better at the box office.

Oh, and light spoilers up ahead.

I Think The Story Did A Good Job Of Capturing The Idea Of How People With Different Backgrounds DO Mix

I love my in-laws, and I love my wife’s culture. I once tried learning Tagalog, but I’m lazy, and gave up pretty early. But, my wife also loves my culture. Both of my children identify as being both Black and Filipino, and we’ve raised them to be proud of both sides of themselves. That’s why I love Elemental. In it, we get a story of different elements, and how some of them stick to their own kind, while a vast majority of them live together peacefully in Elemental City (or, as peacefully as a talking tree can live around the embodiment of fire).

The story mainly centers around a young woman named Ember Lumen, and a young man named Wade Ripple. Ember is made of fire (duh), and Wade is made of water. Throughout the film, she has the misconception that fire and water don’t mix, mostly because her immigrant parents have taught her to believe such a thing (though, I wished this idea was pushed a little bit further, but I’ll get into that later).

Well, being that this is a Pixar movie, all of these rather adult ideas are made to be digestible for children, and I think the film does a great job of showing that even though some people may have some prejudices, it doesn’t necessarily mean that they’re bad people. It just means that they have incorrect assumptions.

For example, Ember’s parents aren’t bad. They just haven’t left their comfort zones, and have stuck to their old ways. But, Ember learns to love Wade. In fact, there’s a great moment in the movie where they actually touch and “change each other’s chemistry.” It’s not seen as a bad thing. It’s actually beautiful! That’s why if I were to rank every Pixar movie, I’d put Elemental pretty high. Because even if I wasn’t in an interracial relationship, I still think it’d hit all the feels for me.

I Think It Also Showed How We Should Embrace Our Differences Rather Than Ignore Them

Another great thing about Elemental is that Ember doesn’t change for Wade, and Wade doesn’t change for Ember. Sure, it takes her some time to actually accept him, which is understandable given that she’s kept to her own kind for so long, whereas Wade has interacted with different elements for quite some time (and his family is very accepting), but when she does accept him, she realizes that she was wrong all along…and her parents realize that they were also wrong.

A lot of the drama in this film is internal, as Ember struggles to understand how she can be falling in love with somebody so different from her. I think the film does an excellent job of showing how their differences make them better people, though. It also shows Ember that she’s more similar to other elements than she ever realized.

This really touched me. I mean, it didn’t make me cry like some Pixar movies do (such as one of my favorite Pixar films, Onward, which also struggled at the box office), but it definitely did touch me, because it made me think about my own relationship, as well as the relationships that my own children will likely encounter when they are of dating age.

Being in an interracial relationship means to at first be cognizant of each other’s differences, but then, if it lasts long enough, to absorb these differences. In this way, the differences are something that you both have in common, and you “change each other’s chemistry,” but also have chemistry. Elemental does an excellent job of showing why embracing each other’s differences can only be a good thing.

That Said, I Think It Could Have Gone A Bit Deeper In Showing People Who Don't Necessarily Accept Interracial Relationships

Okay, so yes, I’ve said a lot of great things about Elemental, but I do have some qualms with it. Now, remember how I said that I was kind of squeamish to see the movie since I was afraid it would show humankind’s baser tendencies? Well, upon watching the film, I was actually a little upset that the movie didn’t go a little bit further. Yes, we do see moments where some of the elements tell fire to go back to where they came from, or when Ember’s father thinks water is the cause of all of life’s problems, but I think it could have shown an even uglier side, especially when it came to Ember’s and Wade’s relationship.

Now, I’m not saying it should have gotten REALLY ugly, but look at a film like Zootopia, which I think is the best “recent” Disney movie, (though, I wasn’t too fond of its Disney+ counterpart, Zootopia+). That movie has so much nuance when it comes to showing racial and gender discrimination, and I feel like Elemental kind of dropped the ball a little bit in this regard.

Like, I would have loved to have seen why Ember's father was so against water, other than it just being dangerous to his existence. Like, did her father have a bad experience with somebody who was made of water in the past? Fire thinking water is bad because it’s water is shorthand writing, and it could have gone a bit further. For example, think about the scene in Zootopia when Nick Wilde’s “friends” put a muzzle on him when he was a child because they thought they couldn’t trust “a predator.” Now that was dark.

I also think that everybody, besides Ember’s parents, just accepting a relationship between fire and water is a bit pie in the sky. I said that 9.9 out of 10 people have accepted my relationship with my wife, but there is a very small percentage of people who have given us dirty looks, or people who have shaken their heads when they see our family. Again, it’s a small fraction, but I think the movie could have shown that rare (and, unfortunately, not so rare for many interracial couples) subset of people who are still too small minded to accept love as love.

But, In The End, I'm Glad That I Now Have A Movie That I Can Show My Children In Regards To Their Mixed Background

Lastly, I want to focus on my children again, since I’m happy that they now have a movie like Elemental in their lives. We don’t really get to see what a mixed child would look like in this movie’s universe (unless it’s somewhere in the background, and I just missed it), but I do love that I have a movie that I can always bring up in case my children ever feel picked on in the future because of their mixed heritage.

As I mentioned before, I’ve been very lucky, but I’m definitely foreseeing a time when people will outright ask them (to their faces), “What are you?” And, I should know, since I’ve already gotten, “Oh, you’re their father?” on separate occasions. Thankfully, my wife and I have already discussed their different heritages with them, so they should already be able to tactfully answer that question, but it’s good to know that there’s also a children’s movie that delves into the concept that different cultures coming together is not a bad thing, but actually a good thing. So, I’m happy that Pixar has decided to add Elemental into their repertoire of BIG IDEA movies with unorthodox characters.

I really loved Elemental, and if you haven’t seen it yet, you should. It has a lot to say, and it’s really good. For more news on all things Pixar, make sure to swing around here often.