Mel B reflects on her marriage to Stephen Belafonte: 'I lost my family, my friends'

Mel B says she narrowly survived her union to Stephen Belafonte.

The Spice Girl, whose real name is Melanie Brown, claimed her ex-husband abused her throughout their 10-year marriage. She filed for divorce, and shortly after for a temporary restraining order, which was granted, in 2017. Belafonte denied the allegations to TMZ at the time.

USA TODAY has reached out to a rep for Brown and lawyer who has represented Belafonte for comment on her new remarks.

"In the process of my marriage I lost my family, my friends, my self-respect and I almost lost my life," Brown told the Mail on Sunday's Event Magazine. "And for so long I felt ashamed. I thought I was stupid, that everything that happened was my fault. I had never heard of a coercive relationship.

"Even after I left him I never realized so many other women have almost exactly the same story to tell," she continued. "It was only after my book came out that I realized emotional abuse is an epidemic that affects millions. It’s the shame that makes you suffer in silence. But I am no longer ashamed."

Brown's memoir, "Brutally Honest," released in November depicted her 2014 suicide attempt and cocaine use, both as means to escape her relationship. Brown confessed to the outlet that she felt anxious about her memoir hitting book shelves. "This book can never be published. I’m so ashamed," she'd tell herself after waking up in the middle of the night. "I don’t want everyone to know what happened to me."

Mel B snaps during interview after statement from Stephen Belafonte denying abuse is read

Mel B's memoir: Singer gets 'Brutally Honest' about tattoo removal surgery and cocaine use in her new book

Brown said her marriage isolated her from friends and family and she felt ashamed to be around her bandmates.

"My life was a mess. I didn’t want anyone to know so I just avoided people and pretended everything was great," she said. "I was on the biggest TV show in America, I was living in beautiful big mansions in LA and flying round the world appearing on shows in the UK and Australia. Everyone thought I must be doing brilliantly, but the real story was so different from the image I presented to the world."

Mel B alleges years of abuse from estranged husband

Today, a much happier Brown resides in Yorkshire, a place that has helped her get in touch with who she is.

"I’ve always been known as loud, wild, big-mouth Scary Spice and that is part of me, but it’s not all of me," she said. "All I know is I’ve never felt more relaxed, more myself and happier since I’ve been here. I feel entirely comfortable in my own skin."

"I like the peace, I like the animals, I spend hours just watching the bees going in and out of the hives," she added. "I spent ten years of my life avoiding home, not speaking to my family, not seeing my friends and now I’m back just a few miles from where I grew up. I always felt I needed to break away and prove myself to the whole world, but now I realize the most important thing to me is to come home, mend bridges, be a mother, a daughter, an aunt and a sister. To be with my family.’'

Contributing: Andrea Mandell

Mel B 'upset' that Victoria Beckham skipped Spice Girls reunion tour

This article originally appeared on USA TODAY: Mel B's marriage to Stephen Belafonte: 'I lost my family, my friends'