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‘Mistress Dispeller’ Review: A Documentary About a Love Triangle in China, and the Woman Hired to Break It Up

Ryan Lattanzio
4 min read
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Elizabeth Lo, the Hong Kong filmmaker behind the lauded 2020 documentary “Stray” that followed street dogs looking for companionship in Istanbul, returns with the gripping and fascinatingly conceived nonfiction portrait “Mistress Dispeller.” This look at a love triangle from all sides focuses on a novel profession that is perhaps only offered in China, where the movie plays out: The titular dispeller is a woman hired to break up extramarital affairs, getting to the root of the infidelity by befriending husband, wife, and mistress, only to remind said husband and wife why they got together in the first place. And should stay together. And perhaps how the husband’s transgression can bring them closer to a newfound peace.

With an elegant air of romanticism carried by a soundtrack that includes Puccini, “Mistress Dispeller” opens on Mrs. Li, a long-married Chinese woman, at the hairdresser, a tear in her eye as her marriage looks in crisis. She’s learned, after reading her husband’s intimate text messages, that he’s been having an affair with a younger woman named Fei Fei. So Mrs. Li hires Wang Zhenxi, a woman who has made it her literal business to break up the infidelities threatening marriages, to covertly suss out the mistress’ identity, befriend her and Mr. Li, and restore order to their home. Mrs. Li is most worried about their only child and how the potential of a marital break-up could affect their future.

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Director Lo’s level of access is extraordinary here, with “Mistress Dispeller” only ever breaking the fourth wall when the film’s subjects, including Wang herself, address the crew behind the camera. Without those moments, you could just as easily interpret “Mistress Dispeller” as a fiction feature, especially given the outlandishness of the premise for a Western audience. While “Mistress Dispeller” is light on historical context — the sacrifice, the secrecy, the long-held reverence to cultural norms that would compel a person to seek Teacher Wang out — the film’s fixation on everyday, private drama tells us it’s more interested in what’s happening in the moment rather than what led to it.

As Mr. and Mrs. Li make badminton-playing part of their normal routine, Wang poses as a new friend of Mrs. Li’s who’s decided to join them in the game. Mrs. Li eventually gets out of the way to invite Wang to grow closer to her husband, who, over tea, before you know it, is confessing the affair to their new “friend.” That’s in part because Wang has slyly devised a little white lie: She says that Mrs. Li heard her husband call out another woman’s name in her sleep, which didn’t happen, but that’s certainly a more clever way into his point of view than revealing his wife’s been reading his texts.

Screenshot
‘Mistress Dispeller’

Lo and her team met with dozens of “mistress dispellers” — an operation that seems widespread in China but just isn’t talked about — before landing on Wang as her subject. Wang is able to gain the confidence of Fei Fei, too, later telling Mrs. Li, “In her bones, she’s miserable.” Because why else would a woman subject herself to being the third wheel in an unfulfilling extramarital affair? Later in the film, Mrs. Li and Fei Fei — both in traditional Chinese dress, which is something they find kinship over — meet in a restaurant. “We all encounter temptation,” Mrs. Li tells the younger woman. But moving through life becomes about how to mitigate its threat. At the end of the film, Fei Fei is seen getting a haircut just like Mrs. Li, closing a circularity that suggests Fei Fei, too, could be the next woman to hire Wang.

According to the press notes, in order to earn the trust of Mr. Li and Fei Fei, the filmmakers approached them under the guise of making a documentary about modern love in China. That’s not unlike how otherwise made-in-disguise reality series are conceived in the United States. Elizabeth Lo takes a fly-on-the-wall approach to each scene, never intervening or trying to pump in drama when it’s not there organically. At the end of filming, Lo had Wang review the material to ensure nothing violated Chinese law — and eventually, the filmmakers revealed to their subjects the true nature of the documentary. All consented to the film’s release, their participation preserved therein.

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A documentary about the making of this documentary would be in order once you start looking for the seams here — because there aren’t any. This level of intimacy and access is rare in any nonfiction film, guiding “Mistress Dispeller” toward a profound and searching panorama of loneliness and partnership, where everyone gets a chance to be heard.

Grade: B+

“Mistress Dispeller” world premiered at the 2024 Venice Film Festival. It is currently seeking U.S. distribution.

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