Nia Long says public support amid Ime Udoka's cheating scandal 'saved my life'
Nia Long says Ime Udoka's cheating scandal was "a gut punch."
The Best Man and Boyz n the Hood actress, 52, opened up about her engagement combusting when her longtime fiancé — and head coach of the Boston Celtics — had a relationship with a female subordinate. Long, who shares an 11-year-old son, Kez, with Udoka, took issue with how the NBA team handled the situation, saying "it could’ve all been handled internally" instead of airing her family's business publicly. Udoka was suspended for the 2022-23 NBA season.
"The Celtics made a choice to make my family business public, and I don’t understand why," she told New York magazine's The Cut. "It could’ve all been handled internally. I do understand why, but I can’t talk about it. Maybe one day I will. You know, fear drives stupidity, and I’ll leave that right there. I’ve learned that I’m stronger than I ever thought I was."
She said she's still processing the hurt from Udoka's infidelity.
"I’m still figuring it out," she said. "I’m still going, Wait, did this really happen? Because, you know, you’re with someone for 12, 13 years, you think you know them."
The hardest part has been helping Kez through it. Long and her younger son moved back to Los Angeles from Boston after her breakup. (She's also mom to Massai, 22, from a previous relationship.)
"My only focus right now is my youngest son 'cause he’s having a really tough time," she admitted. "I’m sure I have some things that I’m suppressing, but I have to do that to take care of him first." She said she's sure she'll have "to circle back with myself several times" to work through her emotions regarding the split. "But the one thing I’m trying not to harbor is anger... I’m not holding on to nonsense, and I’m also not passive-aggressive."
Long made a point, however, to say a priority of hers has always been raising her sons who are "gentlemen and respectful of women. That’s my biggest thing right now. Anyone around me has to set that example: respect for women." After giving the interviewer what was described as a "knowing look," she added, "You know what I’m saying without saying it."
Long said the public support from fans "saved my life" and "mental well-being." She said it left her feeling "uplifted by the community" — almost like "family ... checking in and making sure I was okay."
As for people showing romantic interest in her in the wake of her breakup, she said, "Oh God, I’m not ready for a serious relationship. My mind is not even there at all. I want to go out and have amazing, important, deep, thoughtful conversations. I want to travel. I want to laugh. I want to cook with my kids and listen to music. I want a good glass of wine. I want a good goodnight kiss... I’m just trying to enjoy the moment."
For the interview, Long spoke about reprising her role as Jordan Armstrong in Peacock's hit The Best Man: The Final Chapters, which takes place in the years after 2013's The Best Man Holiday, in which she also appeared.
"The wonderful thing about Jordan this time is she chose herself," Long said. "Which is a lesson I had to learn big time in my life."
In recent conversation with Yahoo Entertainment's Kevin Polowy, Long admitted she's had some "pretty devastating moments ... over the last couple months and I've had to just say: It's alright. You'll pick yourself back up." Long got choked up, saying she was about to cry before finishing. "You pick yourself back up and you keep moving."
Nia Long had some thoughtful things to say about her #FreshPrince costar/friend Will Smith: “He’s carried a burden for many years to represent what perfection looks like.”
She also got emotional when that scrutiny reminded her of what she’s been through with her recent breakup. pic.twitter.com/fYS1vLj7gz— Kevin Polowy (@djkevlar) January 20, 2023
In September, the Celtics announced Udoka was suspended for the entire 2022-23 NBA season for violating the team's code of conduct as he had an improper, but consensual, relationship with a female staff member. Long was reportedly "blindsided."
Udoka publicly apologized to "players, fans, the entire Celtics organization, and my family for letting them down." As it played out, Long immediately started trending on social media, but with messages of support for the actress, who has been making movies since the 1990s.
In December, Long criticized how the team handled the situation in conversation with the Hollywood Reporter, "If you're in the business of protecting women — I'm sorry, no one from the Celtics organization has even called to see if I'm OK, to see if my children are OK. It's very disappointing."
Long and Udoka began dating in 2010, welcomed Kez in 2011 and became engaged in 2015.