Review: Nicole Kidman and Melissa McCarthy can't save Hulu's messy 'Nine Perfect Strangers'
"Big Little Lies," this isn't.
Although Hulu's "Nine Perfect Strangers" is based on another novel by Liane Moriarty, and it shares star Nicole Kidman and writer/producer David E. Kelley with the Emmy-winning HBO series, don't expect the depth or complexity of "Lies" here. Instead, "Nine" (first three episodes now streaming; then weekly on Wednesdays, ★★ out of four) is a moderately serviceable soapy thriller about, well, nine perfect strangers at a shady wellness retreat run by eccentric guru Masha (Kidman).
But fine is as good as the quality of the series gets. "Nine" is mediocre compared to Kelley's other work, which includes a long list of TV classics such as "The Practice" and "Ally McBeal." It's a huge disappointment considering its star-studded cast – Kidman, Melissa McCarthy, Bobby Cannavale, Regina Hall and Luke Evans, to name a few – and bestselling source material. More than anything else, the Hulu series feels hollow.
Although the title would suggest there are only nine characters, the miniseries is about the nine people who sign up to be transformed at Masha's retreat, plus the elusive Russian owner and her staff, Delilah (Tiffany Boone) and Yao (Manny Jacinto). They all came to Masha's Tranquillum House for different reasons.
There's the Marconi family (Michael Shannon, Asher Keddie and Grace Van Patten), struggling to move past a loss; Frances (McCarthy), a romance novelist recently scammed by an online boyfriend; Tony (Cannavale), a mysterious former football player battling a painkiller addiction; young married couple Jessica and Ben (Samara Weaving and Melvin Gregg), rich and beautiful but troubled; Carmel (Hall), a divorceé with a sweet exterior but deep anger issues; and Lars (Evans), a man recently dumped by his boyfriend, whose reasons for being at the center aren't clear.
There are a lot of backstories to get through, and a lot of egos and personalities that clash when the nine strangers start to get wrapped in Masha's web. Masha's methods may appear the same as other Instagrammable spas and rehabs, but there is something darker going on in how she is treating and manipulating her guests for their "health" and her personal goals. Similarly, she plays her employees Delilah and Yao, who are in a romantic relationship, against each other to keep things going her way. Chaos, predictably, ensues at Tranquillum.
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It's easy to see how the complicated and layered story could unfold with ease on the page, with the unlimited words a novelist has to lay out her players and plots. Unfortunately, even in an eight-episode miniseries (six of which were made available to critics ahead of time), Kelley and the "Nine" writers struggle to fit everything they want to say and do into the episodes. Clunky exposition, hazy flashbacks, excessive nudity and drug-induced drama do not make up for a lack of confidence and clarity in storytelling.
And despite the best efforts of the cast, particularly Cannavale, Boone and Jacinto, the dialogue often falls flat in their mouths. When Frances remarks that she's going to steal something Tony said for her next romance novel, it's not hard to believe the cheesy, hacky line would appear in a paperback with a shirtless man on the cover. So many characters make it inevitable that some will be underserved, and Jessica and Ben particularly feel like they're just filling in space in the background of the group shots.
"Nine" particularly suffers by debuting just as a far superior story of the wealthy and privileged on a getaway concludes: HBO's "The White Lotus." Where "Lotus" was a biting class critique that never wasted a line of dialogue or withering stare, "Nine" feels rushed and interminable at the same time, lacking a point of view while looking important because of its star power and streaming pedigree.
But much like the wellness Masha is selling, "Nine" is perfectly pretty without real substance behind it.
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This article originally appeared on USA TODAY: 'Nine Perfect Strangers' review: Kidman, McCarthy can't save Hulu mess
