'RHONY': Jenna and Sai Get Vulnerable as They Open Up About Childhood Trauma Inflicted by Their Late Moms
As Jenna Lyons broke down in tears discussing how her mother's Asperger's diagnosis led to her becoming "guarded," Sai De Silva reflected on her difficult teenage years while being raised by a mother who was an alcoholic
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Sai de Silva (left) and Jenna LyonsWhile questioning Jenna Lyons about leaving New York for Anguilla in order to avoid flying coach, the ladies unearthed a new bombshell about her past.
On Sunday’s episode of The Real Housewives of New York City, the former J. Crew creative director revealed why she was so reluctant to share details about her personal life when Brynn Whitfield claimed, “You give us gifts instead of connecting.”
“Yeah I’m f—-ing guarded,” Jenna said, as the other ladies noted how she excludes herself. “I have been f—-ed so many times and that has nothing to do with you guys. And like, if that comes off as not wanting to participate or not wanting to try or not wanting to be a friend, I apologize. That's not my intention at all.”
The group thanked Jenna for being open and honest until Erin Dana Lichy noticed that the admission didn’t sit well with the 55-year-old herself.
“I think this concept of like, opening up. It's not easy for me,” Jenna explained through tears. “I grew up in a very quiet house. My mom had really severe Asperger's, which means there was no noise in our house so we weren't allowed to talk.”
The fashion aficionado revealed that her mother Barbara — who died in September 2022 — was a piano teacher so she and her brother were expected to keep quiet. They “couldn’t have the television on” and Jenna said she “had to go to my room and just be quiet after school.”
She recalled her mother not having any friends and shared that she “didn’t grow up” being around many people. In a confessional interview, Jenna revealed, “I didn't know she had Asperger's and I didn't really know what was going on until I was 44.”
Jenna Lyons/Instagram
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“One of the things that is a side effect of my mother's disorder is like there's zero emotion — zero,” she continued. “There is just [blank]. When I was a kid, I didn't know anything else.”
As the group rallied around Jenna, Brynn claimed that her confession helped the group “understand why you do things” instead of making “an ass out of assuming.”
“I understand but don’t assume, then just ask. How about not assume? How about give me the benefit of the doubt first,” she answered, adding. “People are just broken, we’re all just f—-ing broken.”
The next day, the ladies gathered outside to share breakfast and rehash the events from the night before. While sharing how their relationships with their family members affected their own parenting, Sai de Silva opened up about her rough teenage years when her mother became an alcoholic.
“My mom loved me and that's one thing I would never take away from her,” she began. “My mother was an alcoholic for a long period of time. Growing up and watching her morph into someone that I don't even know, it was very hard for me.”
The influencer, 42, recalled doing “everything” in her power to “take care of her” but ultimately losing her mother to her addiction. Sai shared that she “really saw a difference” in her mother when she was only 16.
Michael Loccisano/Getty
Sai De SilvaRelated: New 'RHONY' Star Sai De Silva Calls Season 14 'a Nice Fresh Start'
“She would wake up and drink and she would drink all day and she's just became this person who was no longer my mother,” she continued. “She wasn't the person that I grew up with. She was just someone who was completely different.”
Despite being a teenager herself, Sai claimed that she felt their roles were reversed as her mother always found a way to get into trouble.
“Anyway, fast forward, she died,” she said to the crying group. “She had a heart attack in a park by herself.”
Sai shared that her mother often looked “super scary” because she loved to draw her eyebrows with black liner. When she was admitted into the hospital and hooked up to “breathing tubes,” Sai said she drew on her brows and said, “You can't go out like this with no eyebrows.”
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Before pulling her off the machines, she recalled calling her family members dancing to salsa music as they went around sharing their favorite memories with her mother.
“It's a constant battle,” she said of the lasting effects of her mother’s death. “It's a part of me, but at the end of the day, I also just want to remind people that my mother was not a bad person.”
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The Real Housewives of New York City airs Sundays at 9 p.m. ET on Bravo.
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