Why Is Amy Schumer Banned from Martha's Vineyard?
With True Detective meandering around its own navel, we're looking for solvable mysteries any place we can find them. So apologies to Amy Schumer for Sherlock Holmesing all over her casual weekend getaway to the Hamptons. But after her appearance on last night's The Daily Show, there are questions to be answered. Here's the setup: Last weekend, the Trainwreck star set the world aflame with an Instagrammed photo of her and Jennifer Lawrence jet skiing. Brains melted.
Later, Schumer, the comedian's high school friends, and Lawrence formed a human pyramid. It was quickly named one of the new wonders of the world:
When Schumer appeared on TheDaily Show, the gossip-obsessed Jon Stewart couldn't help but inquire as to how this bikini-clad congress came about. Here comes the murky part of the story.
Each year, Schumer takes a trip to Martha's Vineyard with her high school friends. But as she puts it to Stewart, this year they couldn't go back. Whatever happened last year left them "banned" from the vacation destination. So they settled on the Hamptons, met up with Lawrence, and the rest is tabloid history. What caused the ban? Stewart pries, but Schumer stays mum.
It's possible Schumer was joking when she gave her reasoning for swapping the Hamptons for Martha's Vineyard. Maybe she didn't want to offend the welcoming Massachusetts community. Maybe it was easier to Uber Copter out to the South Fork. But Esquire isn't taking the revelation lightly. Schumer left little footprint of her 2014 stay at the Vineyard. At the time, the Boston Globe reported that it "spotted" the comedian "hanging out with pals." As far as ban-worthy behavior is concerned, there are these photographs, fed into circulation by the offender herself:
And then there was this:
Does Martha's Vineyard have something against human pyramids? Will the Hamptons act with the same ferocity when it discovers that Schumer is a serial pyramider? Or does the most recent infraction's off-shore location sidestep the law? So many questions.
Esquire.com reached out to the Martha's Vineyard Chamber of Commerce for comment and clarification because, frankly, it's easier to digest than True Detective season two.
"A lot of silliness goes on in the Vineyard," says Nancy Gardella, Executive Director of the town's Chamber of Commerce. But as far the island's tourism board is concerned, there is no official Amy Schumer ban in place. Perhaps things got a little crazy during the 2014 trip and the gaggle of gals decided not to return. Not only is the ban a myth, but Esquire.com is happy to report that Martha's Vineyard welcomes back Schumer at any time.
Mystery solved. Back to figuring out True Detective.
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