Jon Stewart Freaks Out About What’s in His Food

Hold on to your favorite processed grub (or don’t), folks, because this has been one disturbing week in food news. Jon Stewart wraps up the most worrisome of the lot, and the look on his face when he discovers that Subway has been baking bread with a chemical also found in yoga mats pretty much says it all.

And it doesn’t stop there. Kraft Singles is ditching an artificial preservative for a natural one (both preservatives are “mold-inhibitors,” a term that gives us the heebie-jeebies; doesn’t the growth of mold mean that your food is, you know, food)? Stewart, who has at this point ditched both a Subway and a Kraft cheese sandwich, grabs a Hot Pocket—”Hello, Hot Pocket, trusted friend"—only to learn that the company just recalled two products because they may contain meat from “processed diseased and unsound animals.”

It’s all gross news, but at least Stewart helps us laugh at it… to keep from crying.