Comedian Not Kidding Around When He Takes 28-Day Vegan Challenge

So a comedian walked into a gym. No, seriously: Mark Malkoff, who makes his living pulling quirky stunts like living in IKEA for a week – has pulled off his biggest challenge yet: a 28-day vegan diet and exercise plan to go from flabby to fit. A video documents the epic journey.

Most people would find switching to a plant-based diet difficult enough. Add to that weight training and cardio, and that would make even the funniest comic grumpy.

Malkoff didn’t let it get him down, especially as he noticed a change. There were “so many positives,” he said. “I physically just felt great. The pounds came off, and I started gaining this muscle.”

Robert Brace, the tough trainer in the video, who created the 28-day plan, had to educate Malkoff on good vegan (almonds and steamed vegetables) versus bad vegan (unfrosted Pop Tarts). “I don’t think the Coca-Cola-Oreo vegan diet would have worked,” Malkoff told us.

He also learned about portions. He ate almonds daily but was limited to 20. And fruit was restricted to “half a grapefruit, some blueberries, and an apple a day.” Malkoff said he looked forward to those natural sweets “like cake.”

The protein shake was filled with “yellow peas, globe artichokes, sprouted amaranth, and sprouted quinoa,” accourding to Malkoff. The steamed veggies included “kale, cauliflower, snow peas, broccoli, onions with a small portion of almonds and apple cider vinegar.”

The moment he described as “pure torture”: Eating a plate of steamed vegetables as his family feasted on Thanksgiving treats.

Malkoff has been down this road before – three years ago when he did the same monthlong challenge with the same trainer.

Since Malkoff was a vegetarian, Brace advised him to bulk up on eggs then; at 10 eggs per day, he ended up consuming about 330 of them in a month. “I was not an egg person,” Malkoff admitted. The first hard-boiled egg white “took me 45 minutes to eat,” he recalled. This time around, the 38-year-old told Brace: No eggs.

Brace, who has trained celebrities and Victoria’s Secret models, had learned more about plant-based options, and he dropped the egg requirement, instead focusing on the protein shakes and other plant-based sources of protein – and food choices that Malkoff could incorporate even after the challenge was over.

After four or five days a week of weight training plus cardio with Brace, 28 days later he got his reward: a buffed body.

"The overwhelming perception is still that a vegan diet would not provide enough protein to be healthy let alone build lean muscle mass quickly," Brace said. "It’s simply not true, and Mark and I proved it."

Although the exercise is intense, Brace said that the diet is key to successful body transformation in such a short time. He added that women’s bodies take longer to change – and generally advocates a four-day a week exercise play over seven weeks.

The fitness guru describes himself as a “transitioning” vegan. For those not ready to go full vegan, he recommends “meatless Mondays” to start – or a trip to a vegan restaurant.

"Basically, I know all the benefits of it," Brace told us. He noted that he and his family go vegan two to three times a week. He was up for a 28-day vegan challenge: "Devising it to do it on a vegan plan was a little more challenging to me. And his results were great," Brace said.

"The biggest challenge to eating vegan is to make sure that you are getting enough protein," Jessica Goldbogen Harlan, author of "Quinoa Cuisine" and "Homemade Condiments," told us.

She suggested snacks like sliced apples with nut butter like almond or cashew, or stirred into a smoothie.

A surprising superfood she recommends: chia seeds. Here, a recipe for chia seed pudding.

Meanwhile, Malkoff is enjoying the response to his Incredible Hulklike body. “My wife didn’t recognize me, all those muscles. This was not the guy she married 8 and a half years ago.” Asked if she liked the change: “Yes. Yes.””

Here are three recipes from Robert Brace's 28-day vegan challenge:

BREAKFAST

Veggie Pancakes

(2 pancakes)

1.5 cups Chickpea Flour

1 teaspoon Sea Salt

3 tablespoon Coconut Oil

1.5 cups Boiling Water

0.5 cups of finely chopped Broccoli

0.5 cups finely chopped Carrots

0.25 cups Grade B Maple Syrup

2 tablespoon Nut Butter of choice

Instructions: Combine cornmeal, flour and salt in a bowl. Gradually pour in 1 cup of the boiling water whisking constantly. Let it sit until the cornmeal absorbs the water (5-10 minutes). Stir in half of the oil and a little more boiling water, until the batter is pourable. Fold in the chopped vegetables. Heat a large skillet over medium heat; pour in enough until water dances on the surface when dropped. Use the rest of the oil to thinly coat the pan.

Spoon in the batter in desired sized cakes (pancakes will be thinner than regular pancakes). Cook until bubbles appear on the top surface of the cakes and the underside is golden brown. (3-5 minutes) Turn and cook the other side. Mix together syrup and nut butter and top pancake.

LUNCH

Sesame Spinach Salad

(3 servings)

1 Onion, sliced into half moons

1 cup Cooked Garbanzo Beans

2 .5 cups Oyster Mushrooms

3 cups Spinach

1 teaspoons Avocado Oil

1 teaspoons Sesame Seed Oil (plus more for drizzling)

Freshly Ground Black Pepper

Instructions: Heat a large skillet over medium heat. Add the onions. Cook for about 20 minutes, stirring infrequently until the onions are dry. Then add the oils and stir well. Continue cooking, stirring intermittently, until the onions are slightly crispy and golden brown color (approximately a half hour). Remove the onions from the pan.

Turn the heat to high and toss in the mushrooms. Add a couple cranks of black pepper and a couple spoonfuls of water. If you cooked the beans yourself, use the water that you cooked them in. Cook for a minute or two, until the mushrooms soften, then remove from heat.

Mix the spinach, mushrooms, and beans in a bowl. Add a drizzle of sesame seed oil and a couple more cranks of pepper. Serve topped with a generous portion of crispy caramelized onions.

DINNER

Lentil Beet Marinara and Spaghetti Squash

(2 servings)

1 whole Spaghetti Squash

1 can diced Cooked Beets (pureed)

1 cup Cooked Lentils

1 tbsp Olive Oil

1 cup Broccoli, chopped

0.5 Onion, chopped

0.5 Red Bell Pepper chopped

1 tablespoon chopped Garlic

1 tablespoon Italian Seasoning

Salt and Black Pepper, to taste

Instructions: Preheat oven to 400 degrees.

Pierce squash with fork multiple times and bake for 60 min, or until outside is softened. Puree the cooled cooked beets with a hand blender or food processor (you can squash with a fork if you don’t have either) and set aside. In a large pan, heat olive oil and garlic over medium heat. Add lentils, tomatoes, veggies and spices.

Bring to a boil and reduce to a simmer for 15 minutes.

While sauce is cooking, scrape out spaghetti squash with fork onto plate.

Top with about one cup of lentil marinara sauce.