5 Benefits of Narcissism

You were born a narcissist, and so was I.

Seriously, I have a 3-month-old at home, and not only has he has taken over my life, but he’s displaying the classic symptoms of narcissism. Expects constant attention? Check. Lacks the ability to empathize with the feelings of others? Check. Has expectations of special treatment that are unrealistic? Check.

It’s an overstatement, of course. But we do all start out with a “me, me, me” attitude, even if it’s not our fault. “Young children are incredibly egocentric by nature,” says Susan Krauss Whitbourne, PhD, professor of psychology at the University of Massachusetts Amherst. “They are not cognitively equipped to consider any other view but their own. As we get older, we learn to take other people’s perspectives into consideration.”

At least most of us do.

Even as we mature and learn the concepts of empathy and humility (absent in someone with the clinically diagnosed narcissistic personality disorder), we hang on to some of the remnants of our younger, egocentric selves. And it turns out that this is a good thing.

A growing body of research is revealing that a high sense of self-worth and a concern about what others think about us can be beneficial in our lives. As with most things, these traits need to be grounded in realistic expectations and moderation. But the idea has gained enough support that “healthy narcissism” is a concept now recognized in the psychological community.

Here are a few other benefits that stem from having an optimal level of narcissism.

Makes Us Betters Adults

It feels like every generation thinks the generation that comes after it is just a bunch of raving narcissists (hashtag short memory). It makes sense, given that young people are naturally egocentric and we become less so as we age. A recent study shows that healthy narcissism during our late teens and early adult years can help us navigate the pitfalls of gaining independence from our parents while handling the failures that often come during this time period.

Lowers Anxiety and Risk for Depression

This one makes sense. People with healthy narcissistic traits have higher self-esteem, which can lower stress levels and create a baseline of general happiness. “They are better able to impress people favorably because of a higher self-regard,” says Whitbourne. “People aren’t going to be desperately seeking other people’s approval. This can really be a stress relief in our daily lives.”

Makes Us Take Better Care of Ourselves

A 2010 study revealed that people with a healthy level of narcissism experienced less social anxiety about exercising in a group setting. Therefore, they worked out more often. Again, logic drives this one: If you care about how other perceive you and you have a higher sense of self-worth, it only makes sense that you’ll take care of your body and your health. And the bottom line is that it doesn’t matter why you’re healthy, just as long as you’re healthy. (It’s worth noting here that having an unhealthy level of narcissism can lead to an obsessive amount of exercise and also to eating disorders, a reminder than balance is key.)

Helps Us Get Jobs

For better or worse, says Whitbourne, employers tend to favor those who care about and spend time improving their looks. Furthermore, confidence and high self-esteem are qualities that can benefit someone who’s vying for a job, since an interview is the one setting where saying nice things about yourself is required. So it’s no surprise a recent study found that people with narcissistic qualities are more successful in job interviews than equally qualified candidates who are more modest.

Builds Stronger Relationships

Narcissism at the disorder level makes a person virtually incapable of maintaining healthy relationships. However, an optimal level can help. A solid foundation of self-esteem makes one less needy and dependent on others for happiness, which, in turn, can lead to successful personal relationships. “People with healthy narcissism don’t have to rely on others for affirmation,” says Whitbourne. “They feel good enough about themselves that they don’t have to be always testing the waters. That is beneficial for relationships, and what’s good for relationships is good for our health.”