The #1 Biggest Red Flag When Flirting Over Text, According to Eli Rallo
Flirting can be fun, casual and entertaining. It can also be confusing, awkward and oh-so-intimidating. Exchanging quips with someone in person is one thing—you can usually tell if you're clicking pretty quickly. But on your phone? Learning how to flirt over text is a totally different experience.
Fortunately, Parade recently had a chance to sit down with Eli Rallo—influencer, content creator and author of the forthcoming book I Didn't Know I Needed This: The New Rules for Flirting, Feeling, and Finding Yourself (out this December). And when it comes to much-needed tips in this area of dating and examples of what to say, she definitely delivered.
With so much flirting these days happening virtually over text or app, Rallo shares her biggest red flag to look out for, how she recommends using pick up lines, how to get back into flirting after a major breakup or divorce and more. And if you're already in a happy, long-term relationship or marriage, she also shares her secrets to keeping the romance alive.
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I Didn't Know I Needed This: The New Rules for Flirting, Feeling, and Finding Yourself
What's the #1 Biggest Red Flag When Flirting Over Text?
Coming on too strong. Like, biggest red flag ever. I always say treat your lovers like your friends and your friends like your lovers. Approach it like you're just meeting somebody for the first time with a little bit of, like, spice, a little bit of edge. Be fun, be flirty, but don't come on too strong. I think number one, it scares people, and number two, it gives people the wrong idea about what you want.
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How To Flirt Over Text When You Haven't Heard from Someone in a While
I would say, ‘Hey, you've seemed a little quiet lately. Everything good?’ I would see how they respond. And if they're like, ‘Yeah, everything's fine.’ I'd be like, ‘Cool. I have a really cute outfit tonight. Do you want to do something?’ I would just be direct and forward.
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How To Flirt Using Pick Up Lines
I think what makes a great pick up line is being 100 percent authentically yourself. So I think if you're like reading off of something or like taking something from a book that you read one time, that's fine, but you've got to put yourself into it because somebody who is attracted to you is attracted to you, not the line you use and a line you use is only adding to the "you" of it all. So be yourself and that’s what makes a great pick up line!
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Advice for Getting Back Out There After a Breakup or Divorce
Don't rush anything. The right time is your time. Everybody's on a different timeline. When it feels right for you, it is right. And don't start looking for your next great love, start looking for your next great dinner, your next great drink. And that's going to come to you and remember that you are on your own wave. You're on your own path and whatever happens, happens. So you might as well just put your best foot forward and be positive and know that love will find you again in some way.
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How Do You Keep the Romance Alive in a Relationship?
Everybody says this, and I know it's silly, but we do go on date nights and we don't just go to dinner. We do unique things. I think at the beginning it was just like dinner dates and like, that's always so fun. Let's go get drinks! Let’s go to this cocktail bar. But now we're like, Oh, here's a really undiscovered speakeasy that we have to travel to, or like, here is some random winery or a paint-and-pour class or gluten-free pasta making. We get really creative. And my mom and I always say it's work. But when you work, it works. And I really stand by that.
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