10 Genius Ways to Respond to 'Thank You,' According to a Psychologist
Thank you message
As kids, most of us were taught to say please and thank you—it's good manners. Yet, as adults, we may struggle to respond to the latter. "Thank you" is a two-word sentence that can bring up tons of feelings and baggage, some of which may even be traceable back to those childhood days that weren't so carefree.
"At one of the deepest levels, it could come from a sense of unworthiness," says Dr. Hannah Yang, Psy.D., a licensed clinical psychologist and founder of Balanced Awakening. "If we want to take a more surface level look, we can also say that it could be more situational, like...the person did not think that being thanked was necessary.”
You know, because you were "just doing your job."
However, Dr. Yang says some brief responses to the phrase "thank you" can go a long way in building and maintaining important relationships (including with yourself).
"By knowing how you might respond, you might be setting yourself up to have a better social or relational interaction with the person saying thank you," Dr. Yang says. "If it’s a nice connection, it feels good to both people and is a win-win."
Thank us later for these winning phrases that will help you learn how to respond to "thank you."
Related: 9 Phrases To Replace Asking 'How Are You?' When Greeting Someone, According to Psychologists
How to Respond to "Thank You," According to a Psychologist
10 genius phrases to use in response.
1. "You're welcome."
Like many things we learned in Kindergarten, simply saying "you're welcome" remains a fantastic way to respond to "thank you."
"This can be your go-to," Dr. Yang says. "It works just as well as anything else to facilitate a nice connection in the moment with the person saying thank you."
2. "I'm glad you like it."
"You could say this in response to being thanked for a completed project or a part of your work that someone is appreciating," Dr. Yang explains.
It can also work wonders when someone loves a gift you gave.
Related: 7 Phrases to Politely Interrupt Someone, According to a Therapist
3. "Glad I could help."
Actions speak louder than words—or so goes the cliche. However, words are still important when responding to someone's gratitude for your actions.
"This is a way to express your own gratitude for being able to lend a hand or be present for the other person," Dr. Yang says.
4. “I appreciate you saying that."
Can you react to gratitude with more gratitude? Totally.
"This might come out of your mouth more naturally if you don’t feel like what you did justifies a thank you since it focuses more on returning the spirit of appreciation," Dr. Yang says.
Related: 10 Phrases To Effectively Start a Conversation, According to Psychologists
5. “I appreciate your gratitude."
An alternative to No. 4, this short-and-sweet phrase is good to pull out if you're tempted to brush off a "thank you."
"This could be a good thing to say if you feel like you don’t quite deserve to be thanked for some reason but want to acknowledge the thank you and keep the interaction positive," Dr. Yang says.
6. "Happy to do this for you."
Dr. Yang says this phrase resembles "you're welcome," but may feel more personal and specific.
"It gives you a chance to specifically express your gratitude for being given the opportunity to help [or a] work on a project," Dr. Yang explains.
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7. "It was my pleasure."
Like No. 6, Dr. Yang loves this phrase as a friendly alternative to "you're welcome" because it conveys that you were grateful for a chance to lend a hand.
8. "Anytime."
Dr. Yang recommends this one-word phrase because it keeps it simple. (Just make sure it's genuine before letting it leave your lips—the person might hold you to it.)
9. "I’m here for you anytime you need."
Sometimes, a simple "thank you" warrants a deeper response like this one.
"This phrase could be a good way to respond if someone thanks you for being present for them emotionally," Dr. Yang explains. "It’s a good way to strengthen your relationship with someone and express your ongoing desire to support them."
10. "Thank you for your kind words."
"This could be good to say if someone thanks you in a more detailed way," Dr. Yang shares.
For instance, Dr. Yang likes this phrase for people looking to respond to detailed online customer reviews or in-depth thank you's for how much they love the landscaping you did on their homes.
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The Common Phrases a Psychologist Actually Recommends Avoiding
Dr. Yang suggests avoiding responses to thank you, like:
"There’s no need to thank me."
“It was nothing."
“I didn’t do anything."
"It probably originates from someplace inside someone related to unworthiness," Dr. Yang explains.
Related: 10 Phrases To Replace Saying 'Sorry' as a Reflex, According to a Therapist
Dr. Yang's hang-up with these common phrases is that they deflect the messenger's genuine attitude (and expressions) of gratitude. Also?
"[It] could come across as rejecting to the other person," Dr. Yang says.
So, if you struggle with self-love, maybe frame your acceptance of a "thank you" as a favor to the other person.
"Receiving someone’s gratitude through a thank you feels good to the sender of the thank you as well," Dr. Yang reminds us.
Next Up: 10 Best Phrases for Reaching Out to Someone When It's Been Too Long
Source
Dr. Hannah Yang, Psy.D., a licensed clinical psychologist and founder of Balanced Awakening
