121 Questions To Ask Your Grandparents About Their Lives, According to a Licensed Therapist

Morgan Bailee Boggess, MSW, CSW

August 6, 2023 at 8:00 PM·9 min read

Grandparents are our trusted ear when things don’t go right at home, the first place we run to when we’ve got a problem that our parents can’t solve—our first friends. We spend our lives by their side, learning from their wisdom and life experience. However, the years go by faster than we expect. If we don’t ask our grandparents questions, we risk never finding out the answers. That's why I've put together 121 insightful questions to ask your grandparents about their lives.

My professional life, especially working with older adults at an Alzheimer’s disease clinical research facility as a young, fresh college graduate, has taught me more than I could ever imagine. Each research participant I sat with had a unique story but often couldn’t tell it because of their declining cognitive health. Time after time, I spoke with caregivers who wished they had invested more time in learning about their loved one’s life. Now, as a therapist and a writer (and a grandchild), I help people feel more comfortable telling their stories—and learn a lot about life too.

Out of all the life lessons I learned, the most important is don’t wait. Don’t wait to have the important conversations or to ask the questions that help you learn about your grandparents. To get you started, here’s a list of 101 questions to ask to get to know the elders in your life a little better.

General Questions To Ask Your Grandparents About Their Lives

Did you have a pet growing up? If so, what kind? What were their names?
What was your childhood home like? How long did you live there?
What is your favorite place you’ve ever traveled to?
What was your first car? When did you learn to drive?
Where have you lived throughout your life?
What did you want to be when you grew up? Did you actually become that?
What were your favorite toys as a child? Are they still around today?
What was your favorite childhood meal?
What subject did you like best in school and why?
Who was your best friend growing up? Tell me about your friendship and what made it special.
What was your neighborhood like?
When did you take your first vacation? Where was it?
What historical events did you live through?
Did you play sports as a child? If so, what did you play?
Are you still friends with anyone from your childhood?
How did you meet your childhood friends?
What is your proudest accomplishment in life?
Have you always lived close to your family, or did you move far away?
What was your favorite book growing up?
Are there any places you still dream about visiting?
Do you have a bucket list? If so, what’s on it?
Did you have chores in your house growing up?
What age did you retire?
Have you ever met anyone famous? If so, who was it, and where did you meet them?
What is the biggest risk you’ve ever taken?
Have you ever faced a significant health challenge in your life? How did you handle it?
Were there any life challenges you faced without knowing the outcome?
What were some of the most popular songs when you graduated high school?

Questions To Ask Your Grandparents About Family History

What were your parent’s names? When and where were they born?
What was your childhood home like?
How far back can you trace your ancestry? What do you know about it?
How many siblings did you grow up with?
Who were you closest to in your family?
Are there any family members you wish you would have gotten to know better?
Are you named after a family member? If not, where did your name come from, or does it have any special meaning?
Are there any noteworthy or famous people in our family tree? Who are they, and what are they known for?
What are your favorite family heirlooms? What are the stories behind them?
What do you remember about your grandparents?
Was there ever a family business? If so, what was it?
What were your grandparent’s names? What do you remember most about them?
Did you know your great-grandparents? If so, what do you remember about them?
Did both of your parents work? If so, what did they do?

Questions To Ask Your Grandparents About Love, Marriage and Relationships

How did you meet your spouse?
How did you propose to your spouse?
What happened on your first date with your spouse?
What’s the best piece of marriage advice for newlyweds?
Have you ever fallen out of love with someone?
When was a time your spouse made you feel the most loved?
Who were the members of your bridal party?
How old were you when you got married?
When did you start dating?
Where did you go for your honeymoon?
If you didn’t get married, what led you to that decision?
How old were you when you got married?
How long was your engagement?
Were you in love more than once?
What’s the biggest lesson you learned from a relationship?
How did you handle conflict in your marriage?

Questions To Ask Your Grandparents To Compare Things Now to the Past

How much was a gallon of gas when you first started driving?
How do you think technology has changed the way the world works?
How did you adapt to technological changes throughout your life? How difficult was it to learn new technologies?
What were high school and college like compared to now?
What was the salary at your first job?
What were your hobbies? What did you do for fun as a teenager?
What new inventions do you remember from your childhood?
How much was a bottle of Coca-Cola when you were a kid?
What clothing trends were popular when you were in high school?
What type of music did you listen to when you were growing up?
How much did your first house cost? Or how much was your first rent payment?
How did you keep up with the news without the internet?

Questions To Ask Your Grandparents About Their Favorite Memories

What’s your earliest memory?
What’s your favorite holiday memory and why?
What do you remember about your first vacation?
What was your first day of high school like?
What are your favorite memories with your children?
What are your favorite memories with your grandchildren?
What is your funniest memory?

Questions To Ask Your Grandparents as a Young Adult

How did you decide on your career?
What was your favorite thing about your 20s?
Did you attend your high school graduation?
Did you go to college? If so, where and what was your major?
Were you in a sorority or a fraternity?
What extracurricular activities did you participate in during high school or college?
What do you remember the most about your young adulthood?
What is the best piece of advice you’ve ever received about being a young adult?
What was the most important lesson your parents taught you?
How did you use those lessons during your young adulthood?
Did you experience any hardships while you were growing up?
If so, how do you feel like these hardships impacted your future?
What were your hobbies in high school and college?
What was your first job? When did you start working?
What advice would you give your younger self?
Is there anything you wish you would have done differently about your college experience?
Did your career goals change during your young adulthood? If so, what changed?

Questions To Ask Your Grandparents About Parenting

What do you hope your children and grandchildren do with their lives?
What is one tip you would give new parents about raising children?
Did you have to make any sacrifices as a parent? If so, what were they?
What have you enjoyed the most about being a parent?
If you could go back and change anything about how you raised your children, what would it be? If not, why?
How did you handle the stress of being a parent?
How old were you when you had your first child?
What was mom/dad like as a child?
What was it like becoming a grandparent?
How is being a grandparent different than being a parent?
Did you parent your children differently than your parents raised you?
How did you balance a job and being a parent?
What was the biggest lesson you learned as a parent?
How did you support your children’s goals as they were growing up?
What were some of your favorite things to do with your children?

Questions To Ask Your Grandparents About Family Traditions

What was a staple holiday meal in your family?
What holidays did your family celebrate?
What are your favorite holiday traditions?
How often did your family get together?
What did you enjoy the most about your family gatherings?
Who was in charge of the holiday planning in your family?
What’s your favorite family recipe? When was the last time you made it?
How did your family’s culture change throughout your life?
Were there any family traditions you didn’t enjoy? If so, what were they and why?
Did your family ever stop doing any family traditions?

Questions To Ask Your Grandparents About Their Morals and Values

Did you attend church growing up?
Would you consider yourself religious or spiritual? Why or why not?
What do you value most in life?
As you get older, does aging or death mean anything different?
What values from your parents did you pass down to your children?
Were there any values you disagreed with your family on?
How did you approach making ethical decisions in your professional life?
Are there any cultural beliefs that influence how you live today?
Was there ever a time when you had to stand up for something you believed in, even if it was controversial?
Who was your role model growing up?
How have your values changed since you were a child?
Did you ever experience a life-changing moment? If so, what was it?
How have you managed to stay optimistic throughout tough times in your life?
How did you maintain a sense of community throughout your life?

Next: This Is How Much Water People 50 and Older Should Drink Every Day, According to a Urologist

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