35 Funny Names for the Toilet—Including the Loo, Dunny & Bog
Toilet in a bathroom
When you've gotta go, you've gotta go. But what do you call the destination? Believe it or not, there are at least 35 funny names for the toilet that are sure to make you laugh—or at least smile and shake your head.
Ancient civilizations like the Romans used toilet systems over 5,000 years ago. They were primitive versions of the toilets we know today, using constant streams of water to carry waste away.
It wasn't until 1775 that the patent for the "flushing water closet" was given to Scottish inventor Alexander Cumming. His greatest achievement was the "S" shaped pipe within the bowl which created a seal and prevented gas from entering back up through the toilet.
Before flushing toilets, people dug holes and built little buildings over them to keep the weather off while they were doing their business. And toilets still didn't reach most homes unit the late 1940s.
You might've heard the phrase "not a pot to piss in," which is old slang that is still used today. It is a metaphor for the chamber pot (a term on our list) and a blunt way of saying that you don't have a toilet to use. It was first seen in 1934, in Djuna Barnes’s manuscript for her novel Nightwood: "My heart aches for all poor creatures putting on a dog and not a pot to piss in or a window to throw it from."
But let's put the history lesson aside and get down to what we are all here for: the funny toilet names! Not all of the funny toilet names on our list are made up—some are just the actual name that that particular country calls the toilet; it just sounds amusing to the rest of us.
So, if you need a little extra "reading material" today, kick back on your "throne" and see which of the 35 funny names for the toilet you think are hilarious.
Related: Wait, What? Some People Are Putting Toilet Paper in the Fridge—Here's Why
35 Funny Names for the Toilet
1. The Super Bowl
As in "Take the 'Browns' [football team] to the Super Bowl." This one has been said by my husband for the entire 28 years we have been together. Not sure he made that one up himself, but I have heard it enough over the years that I will give him that one.
2. Oval Office
Let's face it, the toilet is oval, is in a small location not unlike an office and business is being conducted while sitting on it. This slang term is coy and spot-on.
3. Thunder Box
Let's face it, bathrooms seem to echo a lot, and the noises coming out of your bottom while you are on the toilet (doing your business) can be loud and thunderous-like. This coined term is funny!
4. See a Man About a "Horse"
The "horse" (of course) in this scenario is the toilet, and the person is using this idiom to politely excuse himself without having to reveal the actual "deed" he is about to embark on. Cute and polite.
5. Biffy
According to Dictionary.com, biffy is a term from the Mid-West and Canada that is another fun take on the word toilet.
6. The Library
Many people read while they are on the toilet. Although I never understood why anyone would spend any more time in there than they have to (except when evading their children), many take the time to polish up on their reading. And apparently, there is a connection between reading and pooping.
The Mariko Aoki phenomenon is a real condition where people feel the sudden urge to defecate upon entering a bookstore. (And no, I could not even make something that outlandish up.)
7. The Porcelain Throne
People have been sitting "upon" porcelain toilets since they started making them in that material around the 1860s. The Porcelain Throne just gives a bit of distinction to an otherwise, rather stinky situation.
8. Gut Bucket
This one is just comical! Since the 1940s, "gut bucket" has been used as another term for toilet.
9. Loo
"Loo" is an actual informal expression for the British, but it's definitely funny sounding!
10. Dunny
People from the land "down under" (AKA Australia) use this dainty moniker instead of the word toilet.
11. Bog
A bog is an 18th-century British word that is shortened from "bog house."
12. Water Closet
Today, France, Germany and Mexico are among the countries where this expression is common.
13. Head
Originally, this word was used as a term for the bow (or front) of the boat. Later, "head" became a reference to the toilet that was often located in the bow of the boat, instead.
14. Privy
An old French word meaning "latrine" or in its literal translation, "private place."
15. Dump Station
You have probably heard someone refer to the process of pooping as "taking a dump."
16. Elimination Chamber
Sounds like you are entering some unknown realm in a Harry Potter book, but really, just visiting the toilet to eliminate what you had to eat last!
Related: 11 Things You Should Never, Ever Flush Down the Toilet
17. Potty Palace
People's humor surrounding the bathroom never ceases to amaze me.
18. Royal Flush
So frickin' cute! The theme around toilets seems to be royalty. Here's a little wordplay on the famous poker hand.
19. Liquid Lounge
This one gives me the heebie-jeebies like the word "moist." Probably because I picture the "Hershey squirts" with this one.
20. Pissoir
I have heard this one my whole life but had no idea that this was a real word. For some reason I pictured this being more like "pisser" and located at some tiny gas station in the middle of nowhere, that hasn't been cleaned (ever). Not some elegant French word for a public urinal.
21. Squatty Potty
It's sweet, it rhymes and kids presumably love saying it!
22. Crapper
If you check this word in the dictionary, it says it is a "vulgar slang" for "toilet."
Really, "crapper" comes from the unfortunate last name of Thomas Crapper, the gentleman responsible for developing the "ballcock," which is an improved tank-filling mechanism still used in toilets today.
23. Porcelain God
Whether you have had a run-in with a terrible stomach bug, or a late-night bender that didn't end well, many have "prayed" to the "Porcelain God" one time or another in their life.
24. S--t Can or Sh----r
Another couple of those hilarious "vulgar slangs" that people throw around instead of using the word toilet. Because let's face it, what people have to do on the toilet is a bit vulgar too; why not call it for what it is?
Related: 101 Funny One-Liners That Are Certain to Lift Your Spirits
25. Netty
"Netty" is most commonly used in the Northeastern English dialect, a rather innocent-sounding substitute for toilet.
26. The John
Queen Elizabeth's godson was Sir John Harington. He was the guy who invented the flush toilet concept! It is only fitting one should be named after him.
27. Latrine
This one is commonly used in the military and can be a trench in the earth in a camp area or a lavatory in the barracks.
28. Jacks
Toilets in England during 1530 were referred to as "jakes." Today, in Ireland, they use a comparable term "jacks" for referencing a toilet.
29. Honeypot
A "chamber pot" or "honeypot" is an old-fashioned word for a toilet. People used to put "pots" or buckets near their beds at night to use and then dumped them in the morning. Since indoor plumbing was still not in half of the houses even during the 1940s, "honeypots" saved people from a long trip to the outhouse at night.
30. Comfort Station
A cozy way of saying a public area that not only has a toilet, but maybe a shower too. People staying at campgrounds will be most familiar with this two-fer verbiage.
31. Hopper
A disarming way of referring to the toilet is by using the word "hopper." This came from the 1900s when trains used to dump passenger feces right onto the tracks out of the "hopper chute." Yuck!
32. Place of Easement
Playing on words here, this phrase puts a nice spin on what you are really doing in the bathroom.
33. Powder Room
Way back in the 18th century, women would retire to the "powder room" to freshen up with powder and perfume. Now it is just a fancy way of saying the bathroom or toilet!
34. Little Girl’s/Boy’s Room
I guess you could say, "I am going to take 'a dump.'" (A direct quote from my teenage boy.)
Or you could politely excuse yourself to the little boy's or girl's room. You choose.
35. Potty Parlor
Last but not least is the "potty parlor." A little nice, a little naughty and a little bit prim and proper five-year-old humor.
Bonus Names
As any good parent would do, this article was discussed thoroughly at dinnertime with the family. Here's what one of my teenagers came up with within like 5 seconds flat.
1. Dump Muncher (my newest favorite!)
2. Swirly Whirly
3. Potty Pumper
4. Down & Around
5. Take the Kids to the Pool (the husband chimed in with this one, which is another spin on "see a man about a horse").
Did we inspire any of your own takes on the word "toilet"?
Next: 101 Good, Clean Jokes That'll Make You Laugh Your Pants Off
