4 signs you're in a 'functional freeze' and how to get out of it, from a psychotherapist
Niro Feliciano is a mom, author and therapist with a master of science in social work. She’s a TODAY show contributor and author of the TODAY.com column “Is This Normal?”
We all have weeks when life is scheduled down to the minute. Getting four kids back to school is no easy feat. Last-minute doctor appointments, filling out what feels like 50,000 forms, sneaker shopping, haircuts, and preseason sports in three different towns.
Like many moms, I was looking forward to taking a breath on the first day of school, which for me meant being able to work for several hours uninterrupted.
That day arrived and I created a beautiful timeline for my morning, outlining the tasks I would finally check off after the busyness of kids and summer. I sat down to begin, relishing the gloriously quiet hours ahead of me. Yet when that first school bus pulled in, all I had accomplished amounted to ... nothing.
Maybe you have experienced this, too? Tons to do, but unable to start or motivate yourself to complete a task? Scrolling on your phone as you lose track of time, sitting on your bed after a shower and wrapped in your towel for too long, or binge-watching Netflix despite knowing you have things to do and places to be? You may be experiencing “functional freeze.”
What is a functional freeze?
"Functional freeze" is a popular term on social media that describes a phenomenon many of us have dealt with at some point. A functional freeze is a physical, emotional and mental state where you lack the motivation to carry out tasks, even simple ones, due to burnout, stress or lack of purpose. You may also feel disconnected from your life, despite being successful at work or having numerous close relationships.
A functional freeze is not an official psychological diagnosis and is different from when your nervous system goes into a freeze response due to a life-threatening situation.
Signs of a functional freeze
Some signs you're experiencing a functional freeze include:
You are outwardly functioning but feel frozen and lack motivation to accomplish simple tasks, especially in your personal life.
You feel "tired and wired" — a pervasive, low level of anxiety mixed with exhaustion.
You have trouble finishing tasks that you have started.
In more extreme cases of functional freeze, you feel disconnected from family and friends and want to avoid social interactions.
Why does a functional freeze happen?
Functional freeze often occurs after periods of high stress or due to burnt out at work or at home. Those who feel they lack purpose in their life may also be more likely to experience this phenomenon.
In my case, the weeks of mental and physical stress before the start of school put my brain on overload, and it felt like it couldn't process anymore.
How to stop a functional freeze
Connect with nature
Studies have found that spending time in nature, specifically in green spaces or by bodies of water, decreases anxiety, improves concentration and encourages more expansive thinking. So check out a local park, sit in your backyard or find a nearby trail and explore.
During my recent functional freeze, I spent a chunk of my day gaining an in-depth knowledge of Taylor Swift’s whereabouts, so instead of scrolling for another hour, I decided to take a long walk, and enjoy the crisp weather, sunshine and greenery of our quaint Connecticut town.
Exercise
Exercise is known to increase endorphins and boost mood and energy. It also gives you a feeling of accomplishment. If you walk with a friend, even better — this offers the benefits of connection, elevating oxytocin and serotonin, our natural mood elevators.
Laugh
Believe it or not, laughter really can be the best medicine. It releases endorphins, counteracting the stress hormones found in the body during a functional freeze. It also stimulates the parasympathetic nervous system, which facilitates relaxation and stress relief.
Work in short bursts
The Pomodoro technique is helpful to make overwhelming tasks more manageable by utilizing 25-minute cycles. Set a timer for 20 minutes and take a five minute break. Repeat three more times, and then take a longer more restorative break. This method focuses on one task per 20 minute session and can help train the brain to refocus when concentration wanders.
Breathe
Never underestimate the power of the breath and stress relief. A longer exhalation can counteract the stress response, relaxing you and lowering stress hormones in the body. Try the 4-7-8 technique: Inhale for four seconds, hold for seven seconds and exhale for eight seconds slowly. Repeat for one to five minutes.
Speak with a professional
If you feel you are losing joy and purpose or find it difficult to manage the basic responsibilities of daily life, speak with a professional, who can help you work through this more serious mental health issue and get back to yourself.
Read Niro's other columns:
What is mom guilt and how can you manage it? Therapist and mom of 4 breaks it down
10 subtle signs you’re a people-pleaser and tips to get your life back
This article was originally published on TODAY.com
