5 easy ways to help girls squash gender bias

Barbie, together with MAKERS and Girls Leadership, invites you to join us in addressing the gender bias our girls experience every day, so they keep believing that they can be anything. Girls report that one of the barriers they face to being anything is feeling the pressure to be everything — not to mention, the pressure to look good while doing it.

Beginning in early elementary school, girls share they are trying to be the perfect friend, daughter, student, artist and athlete. Pressure to please other people and meet expectations without error can make it hard to dream big. Girls cannot discover their dreams without trying new activities, making mistakes and sometimes prioritizing themselves above others. We can support our girls by interrupting the biases and rules that get in their way. Here are five ways to reflect on and respond to gender bias:

1. Question the compliments your girl receives.

Our girls are often raised hearing messages to be polite, pretty and perfect. To expand their possibilities, you can:

• Compliment her courage, strength, brilliance and other other qualities that push against stereotypes of how women and girls should be.

• Compliment her hard work and effort to build a growth mindset.

• Model complimenting qualities in others that aren’t physical, such as their words or actions.

2. Correct gendered language when you hear it.

We often assume that the people in power, in leadership or in STEM are male, and those in nurturing or caretaking roles are female. We can all make this mistake! When this happens, you can:

• Add on other pronoun possibilities, such as “or him,” “or her” “or them.”

• Acknowledge the mistake when you make it. For example: “I don’t know why I assumed the pilot was a man. Of course, all people are equally capable of flying.”

3. Examine the gender references your girl is exposed to.

Sometimes we discover our favorite books or movies are full of limiting gender bias. To help your girl see biases in stories when they inevitably come up, try to:

• Talk about bias when it is there and offer alternatives such as, "Do you think the princess could save the prince sometimes?"

• Notice who writes the books, movies and shows your girl consumes.

• Consider and discuss how often your girl’s identity is reflected by the lead of the story.

• Opt out of stories that don’t send a message that girls can be and do anything.

4. Find ways to dismantle the myth of perfection.

Perfectionism can trap our girls into doing only those activities where they can be the best or one of the best. To free her from the limits of this myth, you can:

• Fail together in activities like sports, cooking or creative activities where the risks are low.

• Celebrate the process, including the struggle, as part of how we grow and evolve. You can say things like, “That was such a hard ____, and I know it will get a little easier every time we try. Feels good to do challenging things.”

• Share stories of your own mistakes along the way. Girls want to hear about your mistakes at work, with friends and family — all of it.

5. Model asking directly for what you need.

Girls are often socialized to be polite, which can mean putting other people's needs before their own. It is vital that girls learn as early as possible when and how to take care of their own needs. To build this essential skill, try this:

• Directly ask others in the family for what you need from them.

• Praise her when she asks for things, big or small, especially when the request is clear and direct.

• Use role play to practice with her how to ask for what she needs outside of the home.

Together with our girls, we can loosen the hold of gender bias that limits girls' dreams and possibilities. The most powerful influence for our girls is the example we model for them. By responding to gender bias in our own thinking and in our environments, we can support their journey, and our own — embracing a bold and creative path to show our girls we can truly be anything.