'If it’s good enough for your baby it’s good enough for mine': inside the world breast milk sharing

Earlier this week, a new mother called Alicia posted on social media an “offer of milk”. Writing on Facebook, she said: “I have a newborn (4 weeks old tomorrow). I work so husband looks after baby and toddler. I pump at work and have always produced more than I need.”

She gave her location as County Durham and added that she was taking no medication and had a normal, varied diet.

Alicia, who circulated her message on a page called Human Milk 4 Human Babies UK, is one of thousands of new mothers exchanging breast milk on social media. The page she used has almost 17,000 followers, but it is not the only forum for the unregulated exchange of breast milk online. Others have also been created for the same purpose: connecting lactating women who have a breast milk surplus to donate with new mothers desperate to feed their baby breast milk but who are, for whatever reason, unable to give them enough, or any, themselves. 

Yet the practice, which has come under the spotlight this week following a BBC investigation, is feared to carry with it some serious risks, and the Department of Health and Food Standards Agency have both warned against it. Among the dangers of such unregulated breast milk donation is the potential transfer of blood-borne viruses such as HIV, syphilis and hepatitis B, as well as serious bacterial infections such as E.coli, say critics.

Another post this week, by a woman called Josie, reads: “I have about 700ml of milk expressed in my daughter's first few weeks, which she can't have as it contains dairy/soya...Am in Moray but will be going up to Inverness tomorrow if anyone up there would like it!”

She declares herself a non-smoking, non-drinking vegetarian, information that seems to suggest the purity and quality of the milk she is offering. But such assurances may not be sufficient to guarantee the safety of the schemes, it is feared.

The social media pages are not the only outlet mothers have for such exchange: there also exist 16 official milk banks across the UK and Ireland where donated milk is subject to strict disease controls. With these, the donor mothers undergo health and lifestyle screening as well as blood tests for HIV, hepatitis B and C, syphilis and human T-cell lymphotropic virus (HTLV). The milk is expressed hygienically in the donor’s home, frozen and collected regularly by milk bank staff.

Once received by the milk bank, the milk is then tested and bottles with bacteria above safe levels are jettisoned. The rest is heat-treated for 30 minutes, which the NHS says ensures “a completely safe product.”

In theory, this milk should be available to any new mother who needs it. A statement from the World Health Organisation and UNICEF quoted on the NHS webpage about milk banks says: “Where it is not possible for the biological mother to breastfeed, the first alternative, if available, should be the use of human breast milk from other sources. Human milkbanks should be made available in appropriate situations”

In reality, however, the “safe” reserves from the official milk banks are mainly sent to ill and preterm babies, leaving mothers of those who are neither to roam the internet in search of alternative sources. And the emotional stakes can be high.

A mother called Natalie from North West London posted on Saturday: “My boy is only 9 weeks old and I can't breastfeed him anymore due to my illness. I have to give him formula but I really didn't want to. My plan was to fully breastfeed him till he is 1. Feeling like a total failure. Donor milk would be a better compromise.”

The NHS is now facing calls to improve its official distribution system, to prevent women like Natalie from having to look elsewhere. But in the meantime, the online communities that have taken matters into their own hands are sure to continue what they’re doing, the donors motivated by a wish to help other mothers, the recipients by the desire to give their babies the best start.

As a mother called Bryanie wrote in a plea for donor milk earlier this month: “We are not fussy...I believe if it’s good enough for your baby it’s good enough for mine.”

In the breast milk-sharing corner of social media, the sentiment seems to be shared by many.