‘I Had An Abortion And Now I’m Voting To Protect My Bodily Autonomy’
When I was a freshman in college, I made the decision to terminate an unplanned pregnancy. I discovered I was pregnant after taking a pregnancy test following a missed period, and surely enough the test confirmed I was carrying.
When I saw the positive pregnancy test result, I immediately knew what I had to do. There was no way I could sustain another life when I didn't even have a complete grip on my own. I was still living at home and just starting my college journey, and I didn't really have a relationship with the person who impregnated me, so I chose to get an abortion.
At the time I told no one, except a friend who had once gotten an abortion herself. I was afraid of what other people would think of my choice, but my friend really guided me through the process. She referred me to Planned Parenthood and within a week of finding out I was pregnant, I went into the clinic and terminated my pregnancy.
Now, about two decades later, I work at Planned Parenthood. It wasn't something I planned, but I consider it to be a case of serendipity. In my role as the first Black Organizing Program Coordinator for Planned Parenthood Advocates of Michigan, I lead organizing efforts and advocacy work centered around the black community and their limited access to reproductive health services.
I've only been in the role for less than a year, but my familiarity with the nonprofit goes way back.
When I had my abortion, the people at Planned Parenthood could not have been more supportive.
They reaffirmed the idea that I was the only one who had the power to decide what was right for me. The day I went in, there were about three or four women across the street holding up signs pushing anti-abortion rhetoric. The signs were graphic images of bloody embryos, but I wasn’t fazed by them since I often passed the clinic on my way to school and was already used to seeing the disturbing signs.
When I went into the doctor’s office, it honestly felt like I was at a gynecologist’s office getting a pap smear. I felt some slight discomfort during the abortion procedure, but it all happened so quickly, much more quickly than I had imagined it would.
After getting the abortion, the one emotion I felt was relieved. The week in between finding out I was pregnant and terminating the pregnancy was difficult. I wasn’t conflicted about my choice, but rather the perceptions of what others would have of me. My mother had so much hope for my future and my family didn’t even know I was sexually active. Sex was just something we didn’t discuss, and though I know they would have been supportive, I didn’t want them to feel like I had compromised or limited my future.
But if there was one thing I could change about my personal process, it's that I wish I would have told family sooner, instead of worrying what others would think due to the negative stigmas surrounding abortion.
I first came to Planned Parenthood in 2019 as a volunteer, more than 20 years after I had my abortion.
I was trying to infiltrate different spaces in Detroit to advocate for plus-sized women. In fact, I had founded my own nonprofit called the International Fuller Women Network, which focuses on body positive messaging and connecting plus-sized women to resources that help them celebrate who they are through activities like fashion shows, forums, and peer support groups.
Plus-sized women face unfair disadvantages when it comes to reproductive health. For example, there are forms of birth control that are less effective if you’re over a certain body mass index percentage and the morning after pill becomes less effective the more you weigh.
I wanted to influence policy in my community, so I became a fellow for the Economic Justice Alliance of Michigan, an organization working towards improving the quality of life for working class and low-income communities. It was through them that I first connected with the Planned Parenthood here in Michigan. I knew that getting involved with Planned Parenthood would allow me to effect change in Detroit's health system.
My goal has always been to help people in the Black and plus-sized communities of Detroit and Planned Parenthood gave me an avenue to do that.
Through my volunteer work, I'm able to connect with women, especially Black women, who need support from someone who looks like them. I lead sessions on how to use and access health services and how to advocate for yourself, and have shared my story in the hopes of destigmatizing abortion and sexual reproductive health.
In order to prepare to tell my story publicly for the first time, I underwent training with other women who are in Planned Parenthoods' Speakers Bureau. Hearing their stories was so inspiring that it made me realize my own story had value too. So when it was my turn to speak in front of an audience for the first time, I didn't really feel nervous. Instead, I felt like I was finally ready.
It was actually preparing to share my story publicly that motivated me to open up to my sisters about my abortion, even though I was still nervous to have those conversations. I didn’t know what they would think, since it had been over two decades since my abortion.
I first opened up to my sister a day before speaking in front of a legislative panel at the State Capitol in Michigan. She was so supportive, and asked why I hadn't opened up sooner. Shortly after, I also opened up to my other sister.
I know that if I had told my sisters about my abortion in real time, back when I was in college, that they would have been supportive back then too. But at the time, I didn't want to burden them with thoughts of how they could possibly help me.
Unfortunately, I wasn’t able to tell my mom about my abortion before she passed, but I feel that she is present in my advocacy work. Shortly after I spoke at the State Capitol in Michigan, a Black woman came up to me and hugged me without saying a word. She didn’t know that I needed that, and in that moment, I really felt like that was my mom, like it was a sign that she was present in that space.
Right now, the freedom to do what we want with our bodies is under attack.
The stakes are really high this election year, especially in regards to reproductive healthcare access. This administration has tried to undermine democracy, deny access to healthcare, and take away reproductive health resources, like abortion, which usually harms the most vulnerable. People of color, LGBTQ, rural communities, plus-sized people, and people in poverty have all been the targets of this administration. So I’m eager to vote for someone that will vote for my interests and that won't be Donald Trump.
Locally, I’m really looking forward to voting for United States Senator from the state of Michigan, Gary Peters, who’s running to keep his role in the Senate. Senator Peters has been a champion for fighting to protect and expand our public health and infrastructure, especially in the face of COVID-19. He has also been an advocate for increasing access to reproductive health services, which is why he’s been endorsed by the Planned Parenthood Action Fund, and he isn't all talk. Peters is actually co-sponsoring the Momnibus Bill, which attempts to address maternal health in Black women, who are affected by disproportionate mortality rates from childbirth-related complications.
But most importantly, his ideologies don’t intrude on mine. What I choose to do with my body should be only up to me and not influenced by a politician's view of what they think I should do. This why we need politicians who will fight to protect and expand access to sexual health services, including abortion.
Protecting our right to choose is time-sensitive. I feel an urgency I’ve never felt before to advocate for my community and that’s why I’ll be eagerly heading to the polls this November.
You Might Also Like