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Cosmopolitan

The Classic Christmas Movie You Should Watch Based on Your Zodiac Sign

Courtney Perkins
Updated
Photo credit: Katie Buckleitner
Photo credit: Katie Buckleitner

From Cosmopolitan

With so many amazingly cheesy Christmas movies right at our fingertips, it can be tough to narrow down which one is right for you. How are you supposed to know if you're in the mood to laugh at the holiday hijinx of Home Alone or Christmas Vacation? Maybe you actually want to melt your own heart with something like Love Actually or The Holiday? Astrology helps us make pretty much every other decision, so why not try it here. Here, the classic Christmas movies you should watch, based solely on your Zodiac sign.

Aries already live as though they only have three weeks left on this Earth, so The Last Holiday is truly the fantasy of their vision boards. When Queen Latifah finds out she has a terminal illness, she quits her job, uproots her life, and heads Europe with the intent of blowing all of her money until she dies.

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Aries, live vicariously through Queen Latifah and enjoy nodding in agreement with her impulsive decisions and purchases!

The Taurus dream: de-stressing and trying everyone else’s face products! Taureans will see themselves in Kevin’s spa day, his plucky bravery in the face of the robbers, and his strong self reliance. Then, the warm, cuddly themes of the movie will fill their sensitive lil Venusian hearts with love.

Gemini is a social sign that always wants to know the hot goss, the details of everyone’s personal relationships, and how it’s all connected. With approximately ten central storylines, Love Actually will keep your quick mind entertained and satisfy your need for humor and wit! But most importantly, it will make you feel like you’re in the middle of everyone's business!

Gentle! Jovial! Will travel the world in search of family! This movie feels like the soft hug of a Cancer emitting good vibes.

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Buddy is a Cancer, mark my words. He’s a sensitive, earnest little sweet pea just trying to spread the cheer. The crab is known for being protective, and Buddy really went off when he defended his brother Michael via snowball fight! Oh, and Cancer is definitely the sign most likely to enter a room saying, “I’m in love! I’m in love, and I don’t care who knows it!”

The drama! The action! The quotability! The warm heart at the center of it all! Bruce Willis! Leos are loyal to the end, and definitely fantasize about being the hero in a story where they save their romantic partner/family/friends/loved ones. Leos should watch Die Hard to fulfill their cravings for iconic moments, like this one:

Kidnapper: “Next time you have the chance to kill someone, don’t hesitate.”

Bruce Willis: *shoots kidnapper* “Thanks for the advice.”

Virgo's choice is, of course, A Charlie Brown Christmas. Virgos are an organized and helpful sign; they appreciate order and tradition, and Charlie Brown is the ultimate Christmas classic. Plus, it’s only 30 minutes long so it won’t interrupt a Virgo’s busy schedule. Watch it while folding laundry and sympathize with Charlie’s critical attitude toward commercialism.

Ruled by Venus, Libra is the ultimate romantic, so obviously they should watch this classic rom com! When Cameron Diaz and Kate Winslet both suffer romantic failures, they decide to swap houses for the holidays, where they each find new love. TBH, Libra would skip out on family holidays if it meant they were going to experience a whirlwind romance in another country, too.

Scorpios tell you this is their favorite Christmas movie as an intimidation tactic after you say “Elf.” Being the sign most closely associated with death and transformations, they’ll love all of the morbid details that come with this Ted Burton masterpiece.

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Scorpios will revel in the dark twists on old traditions (like the ghost-dog guiding Jack Skellington’s sleigh). They also stan Jack and Sally’s love story. <3

As one of the most lighthearted and funny signs, Sagittarius should watch one of the best holiday comedies to date. In Christmas Vacation, Clark Griswold (Chevy Chase) just wants to have the perfect holiday for the sake of his family and in-laws, but nothing goes right. Nothing makes a Sagittarius feel more trapped than the pressure to stick to tradition.

Sagittarius are well known for their sense of humor, and the blunt, physical jokes in Christmas Vacation move quickly enough to keep a Sag's roaming attention span!

Let's face it, Capricorn is definitely the sign most likely to block out time in their schedule to “wrestle with my self-loathing.” Capricorn's pragmatism can sometimes veer towards pessimism, so they’ll definitely enjoy the dark humor of How The Grinch Stole Christmas.

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Don’t worry, Cap, we know that your heart grows three times when given love and proper respect.

Someone had to stand out again, didn’t they? Aquarius is the sign of the humanitarian, of community, of individuality. Of course they should watch Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer. Like Rudolph, Aquarians can’t help but stick out wherever they go, and they’ll always do whatever is best for the group!

Pisces should watch the one with the creepy ass spirits. As the most spiritual and mystical sign, they’re the most likely to vibe with this Tom Hanks vision, in which a young boy boards a mysterious train bound for the North Pole on the night of Christmas Eve. The part of Pisces that thrives on beauty and creativity will appreciate the wolves and pine trees and snow. The part of Pisces that is an actual baby will love the hot chocolate scene!

Follow Courtney's Instagram @notallgeminis, here.


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