In Defense of That Influencer’s Insane Viral Insta Engagement
When did you first roll your eyes at Marissa Fuchs’s viral “surprise” proposal? Was it when she had to take an Uber from New York City to the Hamptons because the rainy weather would’ve made it too dangerous to take a private helicopter? Or was it when you saw the deck designed to entice corporate sponsors, which includes the line, “We’re pleased to offer your brand the opportunity to align with this momentous occasion”? Or was it when you realized there were (literally) 101 separate Instagram Stories uploaded to @FashionAmbitionist in the past 24 hours and you couldn’t help but watch each and every one?
In case you haven’t checked Instagram lately, a quick recap: On Tuesday, June 20, banker Gabriel Grossman led his girlfriend of five years, Fuchs, on a preposterously glam adventure from her office in New York City to a jewelry scavenger hunt in the Hamptons to a day of shopping and partying in Miami. She’s been documenting every step of the way with videos that show her shock, disbelief, and pure delight. At first, the internet’s reaction was breathless: People, Guest of a Guest, and the Daily Mail swooned. Fuchs’s following has swelled from around 160,000 to 197,000, at the time of publication.
But then, things changed. A presentation meticulously outlining every twist and turn, including Grossman’s plan to propose during a flash mob at the Louvre in Paris (yes, like, the Louvre) on Friday, June 21, along with an earnest request for brands to sponsor the whole journey leaked on Imgur. (It’s unclear if any of her posts were actually #SponCon, although she did tag brands like Glamsquad and Ramy Brook.) Once you realize that Fuchs is the director of brand partnerships for GOOP and may have had a hand in hooking up sponsorships, the entire story feels a little, well…calculated. And for most people, that seems to take the joy out of it.
But I, for the record, still feel joy here. Actually, I’m overjoyed, because this is essentially the premise of my novel, Love at First Like, out later this summer. My protagonist, Eliza, is an Instagram influencer who fakes her own viral engagement in order to boost sales at the jewelry shop she runs with her sister. A few early readers have complained that Eliza’s not “likable” enough because she’s capitalizing on her followers’ interest in her love life in order to get attention and make money.
Fuchs’s critics say the same thing. As Jack Wagner, the creator of Like and Subscribe (a web series about influencer culture), told The Atlantic, “What is the price where you’d brand your engagement and sell it away?...It’s weird that we’re at a point right now in culture where that’s a question.”
There seems to be a lot of discomfort around the idea that a woman would use a sentimental moment, like an engagement, for personal gain. But that clashes hard against the reality that so many of us “do it for the ’gram.” There’s nothing wrong with presenting your personal life in a way that’s designed to look enticing online. Lots of people meticulously roll out dreamy engagement and wedding photos or brainstorm adorable captions for date-night pics-and yes, some of them even get paid for it. Sure, you could call it “calculating,” but who cares?
Despite the fact that we all want our weddings to feel special, personal, and unique-from creating one-of-a-kind hashtags to bucking old traditions in favor of more meaningful touches-there are still deeply ingrained social norms surrounding the way we wed. There’s a lot of pressure to get engaged and married in the “right” way and instant backlash if you flout those expectations.
On Facebook, there’s a breathtakingly harsh wedding-shaming group with more than 100,000 members; seemingly every day, the internet circulates a new viral story about a “bridezilla” who crossed a line. Fuchs is no exception. Creating pitch decks, partnerships, and sponsored content in conjunction with your big day might not be everyone’s idea of a dream wedding, but it is on-brand for our generation. And let’s be real: We can’t look away.
If you, like me, grew up on Disney princesses and watch The Bachelor, you’re probably primed to devour content starring a conventionally attractive woman getting her happily-ever-after. It’s fun, it’s frivolous, it’s romantic…and even if it’s a little over-the-top, I have to admit that I’ve watched every single one of those ridiculous IG Stories.
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