Jenna and Hoda on how they manage guilt from missing their kids’ school events

Hoda Kotb and Jenna Bush Hager can’t be supermoms every day.

“My daughter had something today at school that I missed,” Hoda said during TODAY with Hoda & Jenna on June 4. “And I was thinking about that, missing things, because I have missed things. Because our shift is so weird and they do all the things in the morning.”

“No, I know ... I’ve missed everything,” responded Jenna.

Hoda agreed, saying, “We’ve all missed everything. But then I try to remember that our parents missed many things.”

Jenna and her husband Henry Hager share Mila, 11, Poppy, 8, and Hal, 4. Hoda and her former fiancé Joel Schiffman have daughters Haley, 7, and Hope, 4.

Recalling advice she heard from psychotherapist Esther Perel, Jenna shared, “‘You don’t need to be at every single thing. When you’re with them, make wonderful memories.’”

Jenna added, “Your kids don’t remember where you’re not there — maybe y’all disagree and maybe I’m just saying this to make myself feel better — but they will remember when you make a point to be present.”

In April, Jenna shared fighting words from her children.

“‘Oh, you’re not going to be here tomorrow morning? ... ‘Yeah, all the other moms are there in the morning’ ... ‘Daddy’s the best,’” Jenna told Hoda when discussing how they cope when their children aren’t listening. “When they pit us against each other!”

Two years ago, Jenna described racing to her daughters’ school recital, which was “a minor miracle.”

“Poppy came up to me right afterward and gave me a big hug and goes, ‘You made it,’ Jenna told Hoda. “It kind of broke my heart and simultaneously it filled it.”

Hoda said she tried to be practical when work needed prioritization.

“I do try hard ... what’s so funny about it is, I don’t have tremendous guilt when I cannot do something, only because my mom worked her whole life and came when she could come. But I don’t think I was constantly like, ‘Why aren’t you here?’”

Jenna looked back at a time in her childhood when her mom, former first lady Barbara Bush told her and her sister that she was getting a job and they “burst into tears” and said, “How could you do this to us?”

In retrospect, Jenna said she realized it didn't matter.

This article was originally published on TODAY.com