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Elle

Just Two Sexy Jeff Goldblums Selling You a Jeep

R. Eric Thomas
Updated
Photo credit: Hearst Communications, Inc. All rights reserved
Photo credit: Hearst Communications, Inc. All rights reserved

From ELLE

Hello, internet? How quickly can I buy a Jeep. The all-terrain vehicle makers discovered that the only thing better than one Jeff Goldblum trying to sell you a car, it's two Jeff Goldblums trying to sell you a car.

::sweats in chaos theory::

In a play on Jurassic Park, Goldblum, the only silver fox whose hair is actually made of silver, appears first as his younger self in the role of Dr. Ian Malcolm, and then as his present day self, Dr. Sexual Healing.

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Goldblum, the elder, floors it in a Jeep, attempting to outrun a T-Rex in an homage to the classic film. Then, that brilliant, pewter-maned, elf king, realizes that Jeeps are the perfect vehicles for... reversing and getting behind a T-Rex? Honestly, I am not a scientist nor am I racecar driver Arie Luyendyk, Jr., so this portion was a bit of a mystery to me.

All that matters is that the T-Rex continues running into the distance as Goldblum drives. It does present the question: What is the T-Rex running from? Does the T-Rex have a sordid past it's trying to escape? Has the T-Rex been neglecting its therapy appointment? Does the T-Rex have daddy issues?

(Confidential between me and the T-Rex: the sight of Jeff Goldblum is enough to give anyone daddy issues, ifyouknowwhatImean.)

Anyway, it's revealed that, all this time, J. Goldbleezy has been fantasizing. Very same. Very. Same.

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Jeff Goldblum looks like if the Grinch got in the Stefan Urquelle makeover machine. And, as I understand it, he now comes with every new Jeep.

This is the best news of the night.

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