Here’s The Moving Story Behind This Viral Photo Of A Wedding At A Black Lives Matter Protest

From Women's Health

Mike and I first met at the gym seven years ago. He saw me and thought he’d like to get to know me, so he came over and asked for my number. I said no, and he was respectful and let it go. But from then on, we’d see each other from time to time and exchange small talk. A good year or so later, I finally gave him my number, we began talking, and eventually started dating. As I like to say, we had a very slow start to what will be a very long and beautiful history.

Mike and I became engaged on January 26, 2019. It was a very happy but busy time for us, as I was also in the midst of completing my residency program (I'm now an ob/gyn and surgeon in Philadelphia). I wanted to really take the time to plan the wedding of my dreams, so I waited until I was done with my residency. That summer, I spent two months putting together my vision for our dream wedding for May 26, 2020.

Since I’m from Jamaica and have family and friends all over, we are always in conversation about what’s going on around the world—and COVID-19 has been no exception.

When news of the outbreak in China first started coming out in late December, I was worried. As a health care professional, I knew the history of pandemics and understood that this wasn’t just something that was going to disappear in a couple of weeks.

By the end of February, the pandemic really hit home for me. At my practice, we had so many meetings and conversations about how to test and quarantine patients, clean our rooms, and keep ourselves and our staff protected. When I went home at night, I had similar conversations with my family and friends about what we needed to do in order to keep our wedding guests safe, too.

By mid-March, Mike and I were discussing what to do about our wedding every day, and we officially postponed on April 1st. I broke down crying as I wrote the email to send to our guests. I knew that even if we postponed our wedding until summer, that probably wouldn’t be enough time—we’d still be living in a pandemic. There was no “going back to normal.” Already, we’d been engaged for a year and a half. Mike and I agreed that we didn’t want to wait any longer.

So we decided to go ahead and get married on June 6, 2020, at the Logan Hotel in downtown Philadelphia.

Although it’s difficult for me to get off of work without giving a 90-day notice, my coworkers were so excited for us that they promised to do whatever they could to clear my schedule for the whole weekend. After that, I went into planning mode. Even though this wouldn’t be the wedding I’d always envisioned, I still wanted to be able to show our future children beautiful photos to mark when our marriage had officially started.

As I planned our ceremony, safety was the most important thing on my mind. We made sure no one else was in the room while the vendors we found were working, and everyone wore a mask. Our wedding guests’ gift bags included hand sanitizer and white masks, and instead of a guestbook, we had individual cards for everyone to sign.

The ceremony would take place outside in the courtyard of the hotel, with seats placed six feet apart for all of our 25 wedding guests—the maximum amount of people that were allowed at our venue.

The Saturday before our wedding, Mike and I had a Zoom meeting with all of our wedding guests to go over the ceremony since we wouldn’t be having a rehearsal. In the past couple of days, protests for George Floyd, Breonna Taylor, and other instances of police brutality and racism against Black people had started. I said I wouldn’t be surprised if there was one on our wedding day, so we told everyone to stay tuned and be prepared for the possibility. Again, my top priority was everyone’s safety.

That Wednesday night, we received a call from the hotel. They told us that a peaceful protest was planned for Saturday, right around the time we'd be getting married.

The way the hotel worked at this time, many couples were married there every day, and we only had a one-hour time slot for our ceremony. There was no rescheduling it.

On top of this, Philadelphia’s stay-at-home orders were lifted on Thursday at midnight, so we knew that the protests were likely going to be big. Saturday morning at about 1:30 a.m., we heard that the streets would be shut down. Since we had many guests coming from out of town, we knew that they had to leave ASAP to make it to our venue in time. We called all of our wedding guests to let them know that they had to show up early in the morning.

The moment before our ceremony, I gave myself permission to let go of all of the stress that had built up in me over the previous weeks.

Sitting in my hotel room, I was surrounded by the most important people in my life. I realized that everything had come together so well, and despite all of our trials, we were still going to have a beautiful ceremony. I could feel so much love in me, and although this was nothing like the wedding I’d always imagined, it felt perfect.

I’d written my vows five months before, but it wasn’t until then that I had a chance to review them. Reading over my words, my heart became heavy with the weight of history. In my vows, I wrote about our history of Black people and Black men. I reflected on how the way that so many people saw and thought of Black men was so opposite to my experience.

Some people see a Black man and think: criminal. They feel fear. There is so much racial injustice in our country, and the way that our society sees and treats Black men hurts me deeply. Any person of color understands this pain. It’s the pain of our ancestors. It’s ingrained in our history. But where others see fear, I see safety and strength. When I see Mike, I see the most humble, responsible, caring, and loving man I know.

I wrote my vows many months before Breonna Taylor, George Floyd, and all of the recent cases of racist violence and police brutality that ignited this movement. Yet that morning, people were outside protesting over the same things I’d written about. Thinking about this moment, and my connection to it, I was overwhelmed with pain and joy.

As I stepped outside the hotel to prepare for our first look, I could hear helicopters whirring above me. A huge crowd of protesters marched down the street holding signs and chanting. I felt free of all the stresses I’d had over the pandemic and the wedding. I knew that we had done everything we could to keep our guests safe, and all I wanted to do was take in this moment. As people began to notice me, complete strangers came over to offer congratulations and advice.

Passersby told me, "Black lives matter and Black love matters,” and wished me luck in my future marriage.

I knew that just around the corner of the hotel, Mike was waiting for me. As my family, friends, and peaceful protesters began to surround me, I felt this energy coursing through my body that was nothing like I’d ever felt before. I needed my man to stand here and experience this with me. “Call Mike!” I shouted. The protesters and helicopters were so loud that my family members had to read my lips.

When Mike emerged from the crowd, I couldn’t hold it in any longer. I started crying. This is my future, I thought. All I could say was, “I love you, baby.” We held hands, sharing the energy of the moment, and he kissed me.

Then we lifted our fists in support of the Black Lives Matter movement and Black love. I felt like we were living out history.

I never could have dreamed that the largest racial justice protest in Philadelphia history would be happening at the same time that my future husband and I were to be married.

A week later, I’m honored that so many people have connected with us and share the same feelings we have for this movement and our marriage: hope and love. We haven’t had a chance to have a real honeymoon yet, but right now, it feels like this movement is our honeymoon. Like so many others, we’re putting our hearts and energy into what’s become a global movement.

To be honest, Mike and I haven’t had much time to just sit quietly together, to take in our new lives as husband and wife. That said, we are ecstatic to be a part of this movement. I know our quiet time will come.

You Might Also Like

• PSA: Our Carb-Loving Keto Cookbook Is 32% Off for a Few More Hours

• This Dynamic Warm-Up Will Help You Prep For Your Best Workout Yet

• These Before-and-After Photos Show How Much Your Body Can Change From Drinking Less Alcohol