Naomi Judd's Daughter Ashley Reflects on Her Death in Essay
Actress Ashley Judd shared her thoughts about life after the loss of her mother, Naomi Judd, who died by suicide last April, in an emotional and thoughtful essay.
Ashley penned the essay for TIME, with the title reading, "Ashley Judd: A Year of Grief and Learning Without My Mom."
She began the essay by talking about grieving and going through her first birthday without Naomi, noting all of the traditions they used to have: "At the shop where Mom and I always selected our cards, I read the 'To Daughter' birthday cards and imagined which one Mom would have given me."
Ashley went on, "She always chose the gooiest and most expressive, underlined the parts she thought most meaningful, and of course, wrote by hand her own message addressed to 'Sweetpea.'"
The 55-year-old called the experience a "rite of passage" for everyone after they lose their parents.
She continued, describing her new tradition of looking over her mother's private things and recounting meaningful memories.
Ashley wrote, "I have this week started to sit in sacred presence with her precious things, to look at her strands of red hair in her brush, to hold a pretty dress she left half-zipped, to chuckle at the folded tissues she kept in every single pocket...These intimate exchanges with the private fortify me."
"They remind me of the interior landscape of my mother’s soul, the innocent God-scape that somehow remained untouched by the mental illness that marred her life," the actress said.
Throughout the rest of the essay, Ashley described some of the hardships Naomi went through during her life, including mental health issues, sexual assault, sexism, and more.
Ashley said of her mother's hardships and personal strength, "These assaults and violations, from which she never did heal, remained a source of unresolved agony and fed her mental illness. Yet she did her utmost to fight back with the skills she had."
Noting that April is both the anniversary of Naomi's death and Sexual Assault Awareness Month, Ashley then shared that she will "accept in [Naomi's] honor the Lifetime Igniting Impact Award from the World Without Exploitation, which works to create a world where no one is bought, sold, or exploited."
She went on to declare that she will continue to speak out about these issues and more, including, "holding sex buyers, pimps, and brothel keepers accountable," advocating for laws that "protect the privacy of families ravaged by death by suicide," and working on suicide prevention.
Both Ashley and her sister, Wynonna Judd, have been very open about their mother's mental health issues and death, and continue to passionately advocate for positive change.
If you or someone you know may be experiencing a mental health crisis or contemplating suicide, call or text 988. In emergencies, call 911, or seek care from a local hospital or mental health provider.