Paris Hilton Opens Up About How She Survived Years of Abuse and Learned to Forgive Her Parents (Exclusive)
Reality star's new memoir is truly eye-opening.
Heiress. Party girl. Influencer. Reality star. These are all adjectives that have been used to label The Simple Life star Paris Hilton, 42, but with the release of Paris: The Memoir (March 14), Hilton is hoping to change the descriptors to entrepreneur, survivor, activist, wife and mother. In her new memoir, she reveals the defining moments of her life and how she has capitalized on her experiences to create a multibillion-dollar empire and find fulfillment.
You had written a “biography” previously, Confessions of an Heiress. So why the new book?
That was more of a fun, tongue-in-cheek book. This book is very serious and it’s my life story, everything that I’ve gone through. I felt that my documentary, This Is Paris, was the first time that I had really been vulnerable and opened up and showed who I truly was. I felt there was so much more to the story. I think it’s an important story, especially for young girls to read. I wish I had had this type of book back when I was a teenager. I’m so incredibly proud of this memoir. I really put my heart and soul into it.
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You talk a lot about your traumatic experience at Provo Canyon School [a psychiatric youth residential treatment center]. How did surviving that abuse lead to who you are today?
That definitely made me strong and able to have a really tough skin to make it through anything. Especially in this town. It also gave me the drive to work hard to become successful, so that no one would be able to control me again.
Is your work trying to pass laws for troubled teens to show solidarity to other young people going through the same abuse?
[My experience] was so traumatizing that I kept it in for over 20 years. That was because these places really instill shame. That’s what they do to the children to keep them silent. I feel now that maybe God put me through that and gave me this special gift so that one day I could be the hero that I needed when I was a little girl in there. So that I could use my platform to help be a voice for the voiceless, the survivors and the people who haven’t survived this industry, because it's a multibillion-dollar industry that’s been happening for 60 years.
Me using my voice has resulted in more change and more impact than in the past 60 years of people trying to fight for this, so I’m just going to continue to help let people know what’s happening behind closed doors. I’ve already changed laws, and I introduced my bill a few months back in D.C., so it’ll be illegal in all 50 states for children to be abused at these places.
It's incredible that you were able to forgive your parents for subjecting you to one of those programs.
As a teenager, I didn’t know what I know now. Now I understand that the parents of these children are just as much the victims as the children. These places lie, they have deceptive marketing, they manipulate the families. My parents thought they were sending me to a normal boarding school. They had no idea. No one in their wildest dreams could imagine the type of things they do to children in these places. My parents are so horrified now that they know the truth of what was happening. I completely forgive them because I understand.
When you said yes to The Simple Life, did you have any idea how the image that you projected on the show would stick?
The Simple Life was the first of its kind, so we really had no blueprint to follow. I had no idea that it would be such a huge success and that I would have to continue playing that character for five seasons. A lot of people assumed that was who I really was in real life. I’m not a dumb blonde. I’m just very good at pretending to be one. I love to be underestimated and prove people wrong. That’s just how I’ve always been. Now, with what I’ve built with my business and my company, 11:11 Media, when I walk into a boardroom, people understand and see the type of businesswoman I am and that I’m not anything like the character that I portrayed on that show. I’m proud that people are finally seeing that I was in on the joke the entire time and knew exactly what I was doing.
You talk about your ADHD diagnosis in the memoir and how you weren’t diagnosed until you were in your 20s. Do you think if you had been diagnosed earlier it would have made a difference?
I think as a teenager I wouldn’t have ended up at one of these types of boarding schools. A lot of the kids there have ADHD, and they just don’t do well in school. If you’re not on medication, it’s hard to concentrate. If you’re not diagnosed, people just assume you don’t know how to be in school.
But, also, I think of it as a superpower because I have a brain that moves so fast. It’s like a Ferrari. I’m constantly thinking of new ideas and being creative. I think that’s why I’ve always been a trailblazer and a pioneer. Because of this superpower of ADHD, I’m someone who does things first and thinks into the future. I think if you harness it in the correct way, you can use it in a positive way. I’ve seen so many other people in this industry and the business who have it, as well, and they’re some of the most creative, brilliant geniuses I’ve met in my life.
You mentioned that when you came out of the school that you wanted to make a lot of money to feel safe, so that nobody would have control of you again. Is that what drives you even now?
In the beginning, that’s definitely what gave me the drive to work hard and become so successful and make so much money that no one could ever tell me what to do ever again. But now I love what I do. I think it just runs in my blood from my family. I love working hard, I love creating things, I love doing music, fashion, beauty, making incredible products for all my fans. I love traveling and doing meet-and-greets all around the world and making amazing music for my fans.
I’m making so many people around the world happy and bringing that sparkle. I feel like we need more of that in this world, especially with the past few years because of all the hard things that happened. I really love what I do. I just feel so blessed and so grateful every single day.
After being low-key for a little while, you did Cooking With Paris (Netflix), a reality show about your engagement called Paris in Love (Peacock), the This Is Paris documentary (YouTube) and you launched shopparishilton.com. Does this all feel like a comeback for you?
I moved to Europe and I was living there for about a year and a half, just focusing on my businesses and building my empire. I turned down every single reality show and movie. I’ve always loved the entertainment industry. It’s where I started with The Simple Life. Now that I have my media company, my production company, I’m the executive producer on everything that I do now. These are my creations.
This is all a part of taking back the power and owning everything, all my product lines. I’m building a massive global empire and as a female entrepreneur, I love being an inspiration to other girls. The sky is the limit. I’ve never felt more excited about life. I have the most amazing husband (Carter Reum) and he is such a brilliant businessman, as well. Together, as a team, I’m killing it more than ever and I’m just so excited.
When you look back, are there any regrets? Or did you need to go through everything to get here?
I am such a strong woman because of everything that I’ve been through. I feel like everything we go through in life just builds you up to be a stronger and better person.
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Congratulations on being a new mom. What surprised you about the experience?
Just that feeling of this instant bond, just looking in his eyes and feeling a love that I have never experienced before in my life. Everyone would say that to me, they’re like, “When you meet your baby for the first time, you’ll experience this love that you’ve never experienced before.” I just want to protect him. I’m so obsessed with him and he’s just such a little angel. I’ve never felt happier or fuller in my life. My life feels so complete now with him.
What about Carter? Is he a hands-on dad?
Yes, they are so cute together and it melts my heart just watching him with the baby. Every night, we do skin-to-skin where he lays on us and we just stare at him, and we change diapers and do bottle feedings every day together.
So much of your business takes you away from home. Are you going to cut back now that you’re a mom?
I was traveling 250 days out of the year. I was in a different country basically every week. I have told my team that I very much need to cut down. I’ve been saying no to a lot of things and being very selective. Anytime I’m doing photo shoots, today we’re doing it in the studio, but I usually will do it at home. We’ve built my recording studio at home, so I’m recording my album there. I have my podcasting studio there. So, literally the baby’s room is 10 feet away so I can go in and out all day long. I try to do as much as I can from the house, interviews, photo shoots, all of that. I’m more about mom life than boss-babe life now.
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