Paulina Porizkova alleges Ric Ocasek was controlling during their marriage: ‘He didn’t want me to go anywhere’
Paulina Porizkova is speaking out about her marriage to the late musician Ric Ocasek.
Sharing on the podcast The Conversation with Amanda de Cadenet, the supermodel alleged that Ocasek, who died in 2019 in their home in New York City, was controlling during their relationship. While she said she “construed his interest for love,” she came to realize it was more of an “obsession” for the Cars frontman.
“He didn't want me to do anything,” Porizkova told de Cadenet of their marriage, which began when she was 24 and he 45. “He didn't want me to go anywhere. He wanted me to be within his circle at all times. I was his soul emotional provider for everything, and I confused that with love.”
She explained to de Cadenet that she often felt more like a “treasured possession” than a person when she was with Ocasek.
“It was a collective thing that just stuck with me forever, and I still feel that way, which, of course, is remarkable then that me, self-proclaimed feminist, goes and marries a guy who tells her how to dress,” she shared.
Ultimately, Porizkova and Ocasek’s relationship soured. They were legally separated and going through a divorce when the musician died. Porizkova learned after his death that he cut her out of his will, which devastated her.
“It's a betrayal,” she said. “It's a betrayal of my trust and my love and everything I put into him for years and years and years. And I have no way of knowing what possessed him to do this.”
In a recent Instagram post, Porizkova shared a photo of herself crying alongside a caption about overcoming betrayal.
“When you've been betrayed- promised something, only to have that promise broken without your participation — you were blindsided,” she wrote. “You trusted someone you loved, and now all love is suspect. But love is not possible without trust. And a world without love is not worth living. (All kinds of love). So what does one do when you want to stay open, but the wind of betrayal keeps slamming the door? I guess — maybe — walk outside and brave the weather?"
Porizkova also opened up about her complicated feelings surrounding Ocasek’s death in an interview with Yahoo Life, in which she discussed grief.
“There's a certain amount of grieving that you're supposed to do, where people say, ‘Oh, you poor thing, you're grieving. We totally get it.’ And then at some point people get bored,” she noted. “This is just human nature. It's not like there's anything mean about it or anything like that. It's just that everybody will get sick of you talking about the same thing forever. So when they get sick of you talking about it, then it is just you and your thoughts. And so I've found it really helpful to communicate with people online that were in similar positions where we can say, ‘I'm not alone, and you're not alone.’”
Though Porizkova may be able to acknowledge the negative parts of her relationship, she has also celebrated the good. In a September Instagram post commemorating the two year anniversary of Ocasek’s death, she shared a photo from the couple’s last vacation together, writing, “So many memories. And in the 35 years of knowing each other, an overwhelming amount of them were wonderful. This is where I will park. With the twenty five years of amazing memories.”
