People Are Calling Out "Normal" Coworker Things That Are Actually Toxic, And I Hope You're Not Guilty Of These
Note: This post contains mentions of eating disorders.
We recently asked the BuzzFeed Community to tell us which "normal" coworker things are actually toxic. Here are the eye-opening results:
1."Coworkers who don’t have kids being consistently expected to work more and longer days than coworkers with kids."
2."When coworkers complain about everything: clients, colleagues, policies, etc."
"It makes it so much harder to be positive about your own role or career when other people are constantly pointing out negatives in the situation."
3."I have a coworker who makes fun of me for leaving on time and taking actual vacations. I love my career, but I also have a personal life and don’t want to burn out."
4."Longtime employees treating newer employees like shit, like they’re dumb, etc., because they think they’re better for having been around longer."
5."Any kind of 'watercooler talk.' I mostly mind my business at work, but I've always been one of those people whom others will unload their stuff on."
6."When coworkers try to make you feel bad for not hanging out with them outside of work."
"Sorry, I don't want to grab drinks every Friday with you guys. I get along great with the people I work with, but I have a family and friends outside of work I'd much rather spend time with."
7."Since the pandemic started, I don’t go into work very often. When I do, at least one woman will tell me how much weight I’ve lost."
"I try to tell them that I don’t want to have conversations about my body, but then I won’t see them again for a month and they’ll do it again."
8."If I'm eating my lunch at my desk, please leave me alone and don't comment on the food I'm eating."
"I have an ED, so if someone makes a comment like, 'Oooh, roast beef,' while I'm eating a sandwich, I'll want to chuck it into the garbage. Also, how am I gonna talk to you when I have a mouthful of food?"
9."The one coworker who has been there forever but cannot get in trouble at all."
10."When coworkers make fun of people who work part-time hours."
"There are many legitimate reasons for working part time, including health and childcare arrangements, or even if that was the only role available in order to get a foot in the door. Plus, I used to work four days a week and was much more productive than some of my colleagues who worked five days a week."
11."My big one is when they 'ask' for help by TELLING you that you need to do something."
"'You'll need to do the reports this month' rather than 'Will you have time to help me get the reports done this month?' It makes it that much harder to say no or stand up for yourself."
—zemt
12."When it’s 7 at night or 10 minutes till closing, and they insist on having a full-on conversation. Some of us aren’t wired that way, so don’t get upset if I ignore you."
—BM08
13."When coworkers shame others for calling out sick."
14."When coworkers get extremely defensive and childish when they do something wrong."
"I was training an employee who was transferred to my department. I would calmly try to correct her when she made mistakes, and she blew up at me time and again, calling herself stupid and a moron, and then went to management and claimed I was bullying her."
15."I have a coworker who, every day, comes in and says, 'Good morning!' in a cheerful voice. Then, if you are busy with a client or on the phone, she will repeat herself every few seconds, tone getting more demanding each time, until you reply, 'Good morning!' back."
"It's honestly exhausting."
16."Continuous covering. I worked with a woman who continually took advantage of my help."
"She took excessive time off, some for real reasons, but mostly for vacations. And whenever she was gone, I was expected to cover her tasks as well as my own. I finally had it and told her manager. I left that company, and I think she is still employed somehow."
17."When coworkers pressure people to eat food or treats that were brought in."
18."The coworker who is always organizing gift-giving celebrations for everyone in the workplace (babies, birthdays, weddings) and then makes you feel guilty for not chipping in — especially when you know they make more than you."
"Like, yes, everyone likes feeling special, but I can’t afford life-event gifts for 20 people on the regular."
19."Coworkers who get way too comfortable in the work group chat."
"I haven't had a weekend, holiday, or funeral in the past year where I haven't gotten at least 50 texts in the work group chat from coworkers just chitchatting. Like, I'm off the clock and still can't escape my job."
20."When they make group plans in front of others who will not be invited. Save it for when feelings won't be hurt and someone won't feel left out."
And finally...
21."Weaponized incompetence: trying to make your coworkers do your job for you by pretending you are bad at it or don't know how to do it."
What are some other "normal" coworker things that are actually toxic? Let us know in the comments below!
Note: Some responses have been edited for length and/or clarity.