Can We Please Wait to Talk About Pumpkin Spice for at Least a Month?

I enjoy cinnamon-blessed food and drink as much as the next person, but I believe strongly that we should delay the Pumpkin Spice Conversation until September 22, when autumn legally begins. As you may have noticed, it is still early August, which is the summer, and it is still too hot to drink warm beverages, let alone warm beverages flavored with spices that we, for whatever reason, associate with fall.

Our seasonal pacing has gotten out of hand in this country, and I'm proposing a better path forward—one that encourages being present in the now, which is still very much the summer, a time for cold brew and jorts and ice cream twice a day.

Weeks ago, when it was still July, a summer month, I passed an H&M store with the threat "Back to School" pasted on its windows. I know children are, indeed, going back to school in the not-so-distant future, but why must non-school-children be roped into this rush to start fall? And I say this as someone who cherishes fall and all of its signifiers: apple pie, football, high-wasted jeans, my birthday, Scorpio season, etc.

But summer is great, too, and we minimize it by anticipating pumpkin stuff when there's still over one month left until the Fall Equinox. This year, the pumpkin spice hullabaloo kicked off all the way back in June with the announcement of Pumpkin Spice Frosted Flakes, which feels like a new record.

Business Insider is already reporting that the pumpkin spice latte will be hitting Starbucks stores as early as August 28. That, I can handle. But to be talking about pumpkin spice now, when I still haven't eaten as many tomatoes as I'd planned? It feels inappropriate.

Last Friday, Starbucks began promoting a new Facebook group called the Leaf Rakers Society, encouraging pumpkin spice latte fans to bond over their love of a season that is not yet here, because it is still summer for over a month longer. “It's never too early to celebrate fall. Right?” the brand tweeted.

Wrong, I say. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to eat a blue-flavored popsicle.