Santa Claus Is Comin' To Town—With the 50 Best Santa Jokes!

It's probably safe to say that it would be impossible to get through the holiday season without hearing or seeing any references to Santa Claus. Old Saint Nick is known for his warmth, organization (I mean, the man loves his lists!) and gift-giving each Christmas. But besides presents, he's also able to provide plenty of laughs—which is why we can't wait to get your bellies shaking like bowls full of jelly with these 50 Santa jokes.

While we associate Mr. Kris Kringle with heartwarming traits like his big bag of toys, milk and cookies, and elf and reindeer buddies, there is a lot to find funny as well. At the end of the day (quite literally), anyone who would voluntarily travel down chimney after chimney on a crazy-tight schedule must have quite the sense of humor! So, chestnuts won't be the only thing roasted this season—we're about to go right down Santa Claus Lane and experience some Father Christmas comedy.

You better not pout, you better not cry—these Santa Claus jokes are sure to have you roaring and spreading Christmas cheer instead. Get ready to put the "merry" in "Merry Christmas" with these hilarious Santa jokes.

Related: How Old Is Santa Claus?

50 Santa Jokes

1. What’s Santa’s favorite fruit? (Sugar)plums.

2. How did Santa respond when Mrs. Claus told him he forgot something from the store? “But I checked the shopping list twice!”

3. Who automatically gets added to the naughty list? A rebel without a clause.

4. Which of Santa’s friends is the most chill? Jack Frost.

5. Who’s Santa’s favorite singer? Elfish Presley.

Related: 100 Best Christmas Quotes

6. What did Mrs. Claus say to Santa as she looked up at the sky? “Looks like rain, dear.”

7. How do Santa’s clothes stay so clean? He washes them with (Yule)Tide.

8. What is Santa’s dog’s name? Santa Paws.

9. Why are elves such great motivational speakers? They have plenty of elf-confidence.

10. Why couldn’t Santa have cereal in the morning? All of his bowls were filled with jelly.

Related: 9 of the Biggest Santa Claus Myths—Debunked

11. What kind of drink does Santa give to naughty girls and boys? Coal-a.

12. What was wrong with the Grinch on Christmas? He was feeling claus-trophobic.

13. When Santa doesn’t want to do something, what does he say? “Snow thanks!”

14. What’s the difference between a knight and Santa Claus? One slays a dragon, the other drags a sleigh.

15. How do elves respond when Santa takes attendance? “Present!”

Related: 35 Elf Quotes

16. Why is the alphabet in the North Pole different than the normal alphabet? The North Pole’s alphabet has noel.

17. When someone delivers a package to Santa, what do they do? Ring the (jingle) bell.

18. What breakfast do Santa and his wife like to eat together? Mistle-toast.

19. What does Santa say on the night of Christmas? "Time to hit the sack!"

20. What’s Santa’s go-to doughnut order? A jolly-filled doughnut.

Related: Santa Quotes

21. What do Santa’s elves use to help them walk in the slippery snow? Candy canes.

22. Why was Santa having money problems? He was nickel-less.

23. What does Mrs. Claus sing to Santa on his birthday? “Freeze a jolly good fellow!”

24. Does Santa believe in fate? Yep, he thinks whatever happens is (orna)meant to be.

25. What would Santa be called if he went down a chimney with the fire going? Crisp Kringle.

Related: 26 Quotes from A Christmas Story

26. Why did Santa and Mrs. Claus extend their garden? They love to hoe hoe hoe.

27. Why wouldn’t you want to get into a fight with Santa? He has a black belt.

28. What smells the most in Santa’s sleigh? Santa’s nose.

Related: Santa's Address

29. What does Santa pack when he goes on a tropical getaway? A red suit.

30. Anytime something happens that Santa can’t believe, what does he say? “That’s (chest)nuts!”

Related: 35 Best Christmas Pick Up Lines That Are a Mix of Naughty and Nice

31. What’s Santa's favorite kind of roll? Carols.

32. What nationality is Santa Claus? North Polish.

33. Why does Mrs. Claus love the Christmas season? It makes her feel so santa-mental.

34. What’s Santa’s go-to fast food order? A frosty.

Related: Christmas Trivia

35. What did the elves call Santa when he accidentally stepped on a bag of cashews? A nutcracker.

36. What’s Santa’s favorite track and field event? (North) pole-vaulting.

37. What do a tree farm and salon have in common? Trimmings.

38. Where does Santa stay on vacation? A ho-ho-hotel.

39. Who automatically gets added to the nice list? Anyone who cleans their chimney.

40. What name does Santa use to check in at hotels on beach vacations? Sandy Claus.

41. Whenever someone asks Santa for help with their Christmas tree, what does he say? “Fir sure!”

42. What kind of weather is Santa’s favorite? Sweater weather

43. What was one of Santa’s helpers called who kept making toys for himself? S-elf-ish.

44. What goes “oh-oh-oh?" Santa walking backward.

45. Why does Santa feel indebted to the elves? Because he's an elf-made man.

Related: 100 of the Best Elf on the Shelf Names

46. Why does Santa use the chimney? Because it soots him.

47. What do Santa and Mrs. Claus play on game night? Reindeer games.

48. What’s Santa’s favorite cereal? Corn (snow)Flakes.

49. What do you call an elf who sings? A wrapper.

50. What kind of bread did Santa make during quarantine? Gingerbread.

Next up, check out:

- 100 Funny Christmas Quotes
- 150 of the Best Holly Jolly Christmas Jokes
- 75 "Merry Christmas" Wishes To Write in Christmas Cards
- Thanksgiving Jokes