For Savannah Guthrie, Self-Love Isn't the Answer

Savannah Guthrie

Savannah Guthrie didn't just step out of her comfort zone when it came to writing Mostly What God Does: Reflections on Seeking and Finding His Love Everywhere, she—in her own words—took a flying leap over a cliff.

"There actually are entries from my journal that I put in this book," she tells Parade. "It's very, very personal and very vulnerable to say, 'Hey, this is how I think of the world. These are the truths that I try to cling to, to comfort myself as I navigate my own ups and downs. These are the ways I've disappointed myself. And these are the ways I try to get through with the grace and help of God with me.'"

The TODAY show co-anchor put her heart out for the world to see in her first trade book, which centers on a subject she's passionate about: faith. "It's the thing I care most about," Guthrie shares. "It's the thing I'm most exhilarated by and challenged by and interested in."

She adds, "And I just felt like I had something good I wanted to say about God and I wanted to share it and surprisingly, I somehow was not afraid to and I think God is the reason for that."

For Guthrie, the love of God is a source of confidence, and without faith, she would be unable to do her job. "I need my foundation. I need my centering. I need the confidence that God gives me deep in my soul," she says.

While some have been surprised that Guthrie wrote a book about faith, those who know her were not. That being said, the New York Times bestselling author admitted, "I don't know what I'm doing here. And I think that's the sense that I try to convey right from the outset. Like, I don't know why I'm here either. But here's what I wanted to tell you: mostly what God does is love you."

Continue reading for Parade's exclusive interview with Savannah Guthrie to find out how her TODAY colleagues supported her new book (released on Feb. 20) and why self-pep talks don't resonate for her.

Why did you want to write a book about faith? Why was now the time?

Well, I would say I didn't want to write about faith for a long, long time. And no one is more shocked than I am that we are here [laughs]. I grew up with faith. I grew up in a pretty churchy home. Faith has always been a part of my personal life. It's never been a secret. But as life has gone on, the more I have occasion to talk about anything from my life or anything that means anything to me, faith always came out. It's always been the theme. And so when I had the opportunity to write something, faith was the subject I found myself most passionate about. ...I think like if you had told me five years ago, "Oh, you're gonna end up writing a book about faith," I would have said, "Oh, no, please. That's so scary. Why would I put myself out there?" And somehow in this moment and in this time, it just felt like the right thing to do. And it didn't feel like a burden. It felt like a joy.

How did you start the process of writing Mostly What God Does?

When I first started thinking about writing a book, I wrote that first essay called "All My Love," because I knew that that was the main thing I wanted to say—that mostly what God does is love you, and that that's what all my life of ups and downs had taught me. So many times we have this God creature, kind of knowingly or unknowingly, looming in the background of our psyches and we're wondering, what is this judgment that's being placed on us? And what I wanted to say was, the judgment is "I love you." And I felt like that was a message that I needed to hear, I still need to hear, every single day. And I thought, I'd like to tell others that, too. And so I started there with that essay. Then I wrote the foreword, and I was horrified to learn that you actually don't write your own forward [laughs].

As a journalist, an interviewer, you're usually on the receiving end of vulnerability. But here you are being extremely vulnerable. Did it feel like you were stepping out of your comfort zone with this book? 

Oh yes. I wouldn't say step out of my comfort zone. I would say take a flying leap over a cliff out of my comfort zone [laughs]. I've been in the news business my whole career and you're covering other people and telling other people's stories, not telling your own stories. That rarely happens. A little more on the TODAY show, but for most of my career, my own personal stories would never come into anything I was doing on TV. So even though you're kind of out there, your heart isn't out there. Your internal dialogue isn't out there. Your biggest fears and disappointments and hopes and aspirations aren't out there. And this book is all of those things. I say it right out, it's certainly not a tell-all. It is not a memoir. It's a book about faith and concepts of faith. But you cannot tell that story without a context, without a reference to your own experiences and how you learned those lessons in your real life with your real feet on the ground. It can't be esoteric and removed from reality. And so, to write about faith requires me to say more about myself and how I learned these particular lessons. And that's really scary to open up about yourself and your family and your fears and your insecurities and your failings.

Related: ‘Today’s Hoda Kotb, Savannah Guthrie and More Seen in Emotional Backstage Footage

Throughout the [writing] process, did you confide in any of your colleagues and bounce ideas off of them?

Definitely. First of all, Hoda [Kotb], I thank her in the acknowledgments. She has been so encouraging. From the get-go, I would send her essays that were just on Microsoft Word that weren't in any way finished at all. And she'd say, "Send me more, send me more" [and] encourage me and say, "Keep doing it. Keep going. You should do this." She's been incredible. Jenna [Bush Hager], the same thing. Jenna helped me a lot in the beginning because I told her: "Oh, I might write a book, but I don't think I have enough. I have a couple of stories, but I don't have enough to fill a whole book." She said, "Yes, you do!" And she actually gave me a really cool technique for thinking about how to come up with material and stories. She's written so many books and she's a really accomplished author and she gave me some super practical advice. Everybody's been super, super supportive and excited for me. And the show has been amazing. The producers, everyone's been excited and [wants] to bring it out, and I'm just so touched by that because it's so personal and, you know, it's not everyone's cup of tea, but they're just really encouraging and embracing me.

Related: See Hoda Kotb, Al Roker, Savannah Guthrie and More TODAY Cast Recreate Iconic American Photo

You admitted [in the book] that you had, and maybe still have, a visceral aversion to any expression of self-love. Is that still the case? And if so, I'm curious, how do you empower yourself? 

Of a certain generation and upbringing, loving yourself was about the worst thing you could do, you know? [Laughs] It was borderline sinful to be like, "I love myself. I think I'm good at this. I think I'm great at that." So first of all, I start from that kind of background, where humility was prized above all things. So, yes, for me that kind of self-talk where you're like, "I'm good enough. I'm smart enough... I deserve this and I deserve that," it just doesn't resonate for me and I'm not convinced by it. If it works for other people, I'm delighted. [But] if anything, what I'm more convinced by and see very clearly are my own shortcomings and failings. But this is why faith is so important to me. If I left it right there, you'd hang up and say, "Well, she's a mess. She's a basket case. She doesn't love herself. How is she even going through this world?"

What I feel so distinctly and viscerally is the love of God. And that love brings me so much inner joy and confidence and calm, and unlike any self-love that I might try to generate. And I do think I'm a pretty healthy, centered person with a good foundation, but all that kind of inner-generated self-pep talk does not stick with me or resonate as much with me as hearing this external voice from God saying, "I love you no matter what. I love you whether you're good or bad. Whether you call or don't call. Whether you sin or don't sin. This is an unshakable fact. You are loved and you are worthy of love." And that to me is the source of confidence, real confidence. And, you know, I know it's probably not a very fashionable way to think and again, I don't want to give the wrong impression because it's not like I hate myself or I'm not down on myself, it's just, I don't know that I'm the greatest judge of myself, for better for worse. Sometimes we judge ourselves way too harshly. And sometimes we judge ourselves way too generously. And what I value is a neutral third party, God saying, "I judge you and my judgment is love. I see everything. This isn't a whitewash. This isn't 'I don't see your flaws.' I see them, but I love you anyway." And that's really the essence of the message of the book.

How do you encourage others to keep the faith when we live in a world where, like you said in the book, the "overnight note" [which, per Guthrie, informs the TODAY anchors and senior producers of major global news events and on most days "is a staggeringly depressing document"]—could be several pages long?

Well, it's hard. Honestly, that's the answer. The answer is that some days you won't have it and there are no easy answers and that faith is not an absence of doubt. Faith is just living and coexisting with your doubt and with your despair, but also alongside hope. It's sitting with that incongruity.

Do you think your faith and approach to believing and being hopeful have helped you succeed in your career?

I don't know. I would never be like, "Oh, I have this job or that job because faith somehow got me there," like as some transactional matter. I don't believe that at all. Could I do this job without faith? No. I, Savannah, could not. I need my foundation. I need my centering. I need the confidence that God gives me deep in my soul. I need the refuge for when I mess up. Of course, I consider the fact that I get to do this job a blessing. It's a blessing from above. But it's a fine line. I hope you catch the difference I'm trying to make there. I'm not saying, "Oh, I'm here because God brought me here." No. I have no idea. I'm here. I know it's a blessing. And I wouldn't be here without God helping me and holding me close and keeping me firm to my foundation.

You mentioned the idea of a fine line. Do you feel like expressing faith can sometimes be taboo in journalism? It can be so mixed up in politics. 

I don't know. But I hope not, because I think there are many, many people of faith in all walks of life, of all political persuasions, of all different faiths. And I think and hope and want us to be having those conversations. And that's part of what this is about. This is a conversation that I hope people of all different faiths and different persuasions could connect to or be challenged by, or maybe reviled by. Whatever it is, it's good to be having the conversation and I think these are conversations that, from my perspective, all kinds of people want to have and appreciate having. I've talked to people who are like, "Yeah, I don't have any faith, but I love talking to people who have faith." I'm like, "Really? You do?" They're like, "Yeah!" They're so fascinated by it. I don't think it's a taboo. I really don't.

You noted that this isn't a memoir, you never wanted to write one. But do you ever think you will? I think you said if you were to write one it'd be called What Happened.

What Happened? with a question mark [laughs].

I think that would be such an interesting read because you've had such a fascinating career. 

No, but I'm dead serious, I don't really remember all that much. So no, I have to say, I don't think I'll ever write a memoir. This will be the closest to [it]. I don't remember anything and it's just not that interesting. I'm not that interesting. God is way more interesting,

This interview has been edited and condensed for length and clarity.

Next, Savannah Guthrie's Headline-Grabbing Net Worth and What She Makes on Today