Humor: We're not witches we're just girls having fun at a sleepover

Welcome to my slumber party, Katy!

I can't believe you're already in middle school, and you've never been to one of these. It's like a rite of passage for every girl. Yeah, really! I think they started doing these back in the 1600s.

Put your bag down and come over here. We're going to make Anna levitate. Why do you look so freaked out? It's a slumber party classic! Just put your fingers over here. Good. Now chant with us. Light as a feather, stiff as a board. Light as a feather, stiff as a board. Ligh — Stacy is saying the same thing we are saying; she's just doing it in Latin. Now concentrate — Light as a fea —

Katy! Look what you did! Are you OK, Anna? Katy, we've never gotten someone that high before; you can't just break a psychic connection. It has nothing to do with the devil, Katy. I'm talking about the strong bond that comes from female friendship.

Fine, we won't do any more levitation. Shhh, relax, you don't have to call your mom. We'll try some other games you might like. Oh, I know! Remember when you told me you were nervous about the math test? How would you like to know how you did in advance? Yes, there's a way! Lil, grab it.

This is a Ouija board. All we have to do is put our hands on the planchette. Come on, Katy, we all have to do it, or it won't work. Look, it's moving! H-E-L-L-O. Oh good, it seems friendly. Do you want to ask it about the test, Katy? Oh, can't talk? We'll come back to you. Lil? Oh, good question. Look! It's moving faster!

KATY! Lil was just about to find out who her date would be for the dance. Now she'll have to wait around, not knowing, like a loser. We wouldn't have gotten possessed. We're not stupid. We would've said goodbye. My mom told me never to talk to strangers or demons; I know how to avoid diabolical pitfalls. But now that YOU made us stop before closing the door, I will have to burn all the sage candles here to keep us safe. Thank goodness Bed, Bath, and Beyond was having a sale.

This is getting old, Katy. None of this is witchcraft. We're just pre-teen girls trying to have fun. We got pizza, coke, sleeping bags, sage, tarot cards, chocolate —

NO ONE IS GOING TO MAKE YOU USE THE TAROT CARDS, KATY! They'd only tell you what you already know anyway.

We'll play one more game. You're welcome to join us. Can you turn off that light? And that one? Don't worry, I've got a flashlight. Not that we'll need it for long. The room has to be dark when we look into the mirror to summon Bloody Mary.

You know what? Go ahead, leave. We don't need you here judging us. None of us are witches, as you keep claiming, you Puritan. This is a slumber party, and these are games most girls play. Also, if communing with dead ghost women through mirrors is weird, then I don't want to be normal.

Oh, before you go, take one of the cookies Mel brought. They are so good that I think she might be a witch.