Topless Tony Adams to avoid red card on Strictly's Movie Week
“It’s never too early for a 10 from Shirley.” Well, except when it is. Two maximum 10s and seven near-perfect nines in only the third week of Strictly Come Dancing (BBC One) was too much, too soon. As head judge Ms Ballas and her fellow panellists whipped out their highest scoring paddles, it was the hoofing equivalent of hyper-inflation.
Tyler West’s slick Half a Sixpence Charleston was impressively bouncy and fast-paced – especially considering that he ran the London Marathon last weekend in 5 hours and 25 minutes (approximately the length of this epic episode). West topped the standings with the first 10s of the series, totalling 38 points out of a possible 40. There are still 10 weeks to go beneath the BBC glitterball. The judges risk painting themselves into a choreographic corner.
As Strictly paid tribute to the magic of cinema with its annual Movie Week special, over-marking was rife. Was Kym Marsh’s Sweet Charity Charleston, enjoyably jazzy as it was, really worth nines? Why did the judges point out so many mistakes in Ellie Simmonds’ quickstep, then give it scores of seven? Jayde Adams’ show-closing Flashdance cha cha cha might have been packed with personality but an eight from Motsi Mabuse? Really? This was the first themed episode of the year and the judges clearly got carried away by the occasion.
Tony Adams might just be the new Ed Balls. Or perhaps the male Ann Widdecombe. The former footballer raised the Elstree Studios roof with his Full Monty samba, complete with patented arm-in-the-air Arsenal offside appeal move. Now the oldest contestant following the exit of his surname-sake Kaye, the 55-year-old ripped off his trousers to reveal a pair of glittery football shorts. Followed by his shirt. It didn’t exactly conjure up Rio carnival but it was irresistible fun. Sexy thing Big Tone finished bottom of the scoreboard but I Believe in Miracles. The public vote might mean he avoids a red card.
Hopelessly devoted to dance, TV presenter (and Telegraph diarist) Helen Skelton channelled Sandy from Grease for a spinning, swaying Viennese waltz which left Ballas “in awe”. Grease star Olivia Newton-John, who died just two months ago, was a breast cancer research ambassador. Skelton’s family has been touched by the disease too. She was keen to honour Newton-John and did so in style.
Matt Goss also performed a waltz with personal resonance. He dedicated the Top Gun number to his grandfather, a Second World War gunner, and his romance with Goss’ beloved “nanna”. The painfully earnest Bros frontman not only got his forces confused but his footwork too. He could be doomed to his second consecutive dance-off.
Routines were themed around an eclectic selection of films, ranging from classic musicals to recent blockbusters. Before our 14 surviving pro-celebrity couples took to the floor, there was time for a slightly tortuous Ocean’s 11 heist skit and the professional troupe performing a colourful Latin routine inspired by Disney’s Encanto. Co-host Claudia Winkleman sweetly assured viewers that actually, we do still Talk About Bruno, referring to ex-judge Tonioli. I like to imagine that the flamboyant Italian duly fell off his chair at home.
The fancy dress box was raided so thoroughly that a few costumes overwhelmed the routines - notably Amy Dowden’s green face and Giovanni Pernice’s warthog belly. Elsewhere, music choices didn’t fit the dances. See James Bye’s “ooga chaka” cha cha cha and Hamza Yassin’s awkward Jurassic Park dino-rumba.
The BBC’s visual effects department went to town, with CGI dinosaurs and seascapes. This was a ballroom bonanza high on spectacle, full of family friendly entertainment value and just camp enough. Shame about the bloated running time and silly scoring. I suspect gunner Goss or dad-dancer Bye will board the sparkly bus home come Sunday evening. If Tony Adams takes an early bath, viewers will surely refer it to VAR.