'We fight every day': Justin and Emily Baldoni share relationship ups and downs during quarantine
Justin and Emily Baldoni have been married for almost seven years, and while social media may paint a seemingly perfect picture, they admit the increased together time during the coronavirus pandemic has brought attention to the parts of their relationship that still need a little work — and there’s no escaping them.
“You cannot run away anymore. You can't go off to work and get distracted. You can’t go and have a coffee with a friend and get distracted. You're in it. So we're forced to look at the things that maybe before we were not willing to look at,” Emily explains during Yahoo’s Reset Your Mindset event.
For Emily, she feels lucky because the couple have “kind of mastered” communication (even though there’s always growth and progress to be made). “Really what's helping us survive this without major meltdowns is that we can speak to each other, we know how to listen to each other and we've created a safe space to have these conversations,” she says.
That’s why, when Justin, known for his breakout role as Rafael Solano on Jane the Virgin, wasn’t being as present a partner or parent, they were able to confront the problem head on.
“We're sharing this space together and I'm literally seeing my kids change. Like they look different than when quarantine started. And it's no different than if I was working at the studio or whatever,” the actor candidly reveals, sharing that his upcoming book deal, movie and multiple businesses all required a lot of energy from him.
“We had a big blow-up because I was failing, and I was feeling like I'm doing this all wrong and we weren't connecting and we needed to kind of reorganize our lives, whether it meant me waking up at five instead of seven and working and getting my stuff done beforehand,” he shares. “And so, so much so that we've decided now I'm only working until 12 every day.”
For Emily, working on the “crap” parts of herself through the use of her healing toolbox has helped her in these tense situations — and grow even closer to her kids and her husband.
“I've made such an effort. We both have to work on ourselves and through that we can understand our children because they truly are our mirrors. And when I heal myself, automatically, my relationship with my kids begins to heal. It’'s like magic. I don't even have to put conscious effort and focus into healing my relationship with my children,” Emily explains. “If I focus on myself, that happens automatically. For that reason, we've bonded,” and, she adds, “we also fight every day.”
As Justin and Emily reflect on their relationship with each other and their children during this time, they ultimately hope 20 years from now, they’ll be able to look back and appreciate their journey towards becoming better listeners and gaining more understanding and learning to prioritize what truly matters.
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