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The Telegraph

Where have all the teenage babysitters gone?

Victoria Lambert
Updated
Responsible choice: Bracken Jelier, thinks her daughter Poppy, now 15, is learning life skills from babysitting  - ©RUSSELL SACH - 0771 882 6138 - russell.sach@btinternet.com
Responsible choice: Bracken Jelier, thinks her daughter Poppy, now 15, is learning life skills from babysitting - ??RUSSELL SACH - 0771 882 6138 - [email protected]

When Poppy Vernon turned 14 last year, she printed fliers advertising her services as a babysitter and posted them through nearby letterboxes. She put a note on the village's Facebook page, too, offering her services to local parents desperate for a night out.

"She had been counting down the days," says her mother, Bracken Jelier, a 41-year-old PR who lives near Plymouth with Poppy and her younger daughter, Hazel, 13. "When I was young, I would have loved to go babysitting. But we lived in quite a remote place, so it would have been impossible to organise. Poppy had seen her older friends earn pocket money this way and couldn't wait to start, so I was sympathetic."

The Jelier family are slightly unusual these days: the era of the teenage babysitter seems to be in decline. Why risk having a 15-year-old who might invite her pals over via Snapchat to go through your drinks cabinet when there are increasing number of babysitting apps and services that only employ over-18s with clean DBS (Disclosure and Barring Service) checks?

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Moreover, why put 15-year-olds in a position of vulnerability where they may feel out of their depth supervising difficult children late at night? Although there is no law in the UK saying how old a babysitter should be, the NSPCC recommends they should be at least 16.

children playing - Credit: Frank van Delft/Cultura RF
Although there is no law in the UK saying how old a babysitter should be, the NSPCC recommends they should be at least 16 Credit: Frank van Delft/Cultura RF

Georgie Jones, of Putney-based babysitting agency Like Minders, says there has been a change in attitude. "There is a definite trend in parents wanting more experienced support. Everyone is more aware of what could go wrong because of the internet and hearing stories online. Plus, we are more risk-averse in general." Like Minders employs sitters who are over 18 and fully vetted. "Child safety comes ahead of anything else," says Jones.

Teen babysitters are not an option for Martina Mercer, a 38-year-old copywriter, who lives in Torrington, Devon, with her husband Justin, 39, a bespoke furniture maker, and their children Mitchell, 17, Poppy, 13, and Percy, six.

"When I was a teenager my mum volunteered me to babysit," says Mercer. "I didn't feel qualified or confident. So when I had my own children, it never occurred to me to use this type of childcare. I am quite overprotective, and I knew I wouldn't be able to relax.

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You worry whether it's putting your child in a vulnerable position - but a lot of them babysit

"When Mitchell was two, we did try a teenage girl sitting with him while we went to a birthday. But it was awful. She didn't have a clue. He was fretful and upset - she lost her temper with him. I ended up going home early."

Part of the problem is that we are moving home further and more often than ever - our families are less likely to live nearby and a close set of neighbours is becoming less common. Mercer relies instead on a network of friends who take turns to help each other - and no money changes hands. "It's about trust - my friends know my children and theirs know me too."

And while fewer parents are able to call on granny or grandpa - either because they live too far away or are too busy - they are turning to babysitters who may be grandparents themselves.

Jacqueline Aby, service manager for professional childcare at Fantastic Services, which offers all kinds of home care, says: "We have clients that request older babysitters [aged 50+], usually for very young or multiple-child bookings, which may indicate parents' increased feelings of security with an older childcare professional who is likely to have more experience with children."

Grandparents
Fewer parents are able to call on granny or grandpa - either because they live too far away or are too busy - so they are turning to babysitters who may be grandparents themselves

All the company's sitters are 21 or over and have childcare experience, references and paediatric first aid training. But, adds Aby: "Teenage babysitters can be a great option for families - a lifeline sometimes - for a few hours at the time, in a setting that they are used to and with children they know in their neighbourhood."

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Kim Swead and her solicitor husband James, both 41, would agree. The couple, who live in north London with their sons Ethan, 11, and Bailey, eight, always use teenage babysitters when they go out, which can be twice a week.

"They've tended to be boys aged between 15 and 18," says Swead, a marketing consultant. "We find them through our school forum, and we also use the daughter of a neighbour. You go with your gut feeling, don't you?"

She is happy not to lay down rules for the sitters, although she does tell her own boys to behave and go to bed at 8.30pm. "I leave out food for the sitter and tell them to make tea or coffee. None has asked to bring a girlfriend round or anything like that." The only downside is the need to take them home afterwards or pay for a taxi.

NSPCC tips for choosing babysitters

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Pay rates seem to vary - Swead would never pay less than £8 an hour "though I always round it up". In Devon, Poppy charges £5 an hour.

Jelier says she vets her daughter's clients. "I always insist on meeting the parents first and introducing her to the children to make sure everyone is happy. You do worry about whether it could put your child in a vulnerable position, but a lot of children babysit."

More than that, she thinks Poppy has developed a sense of responsibility. The hardest challenge has been when babysitting clashes with a party. "She looks at me, but I tell her, you can't cancel because something else has come along. That's part of growing up, too."

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