Why "The Santa Clause" Is a Creepy Christmas Movie
Fan theories always have the possibility of changing your perspective on a film, like how Frosty the Snowman might actually be a demon. Now, one Twitter user might have completely ruined Disney's The Santa Clause and its sequels for everyone this Christmas season.
Hannah Priest, who goes by @shewolfmanc on Twitter, started off by asking a simple question:
Here's a little festive question for you... what is the most stone-cold brutal, horrific Christmas film ever made?
- Hannah Priest (@shewolfmanc) December 21, 2017
Soon several guesses came from Twitter users all around the world, from the beloved Home Alone to obvious examples like Black Christmas or Christmas Evil. But Hannah told everyone that they were wrong, and revealed that The Santa Clause is actually the creepiest Christmas movie of all time.
I'm not talking about what happens to Scott Calvin & his transformation into Santa. Or the fact that SCII belongs to the 'Santa Finds a Wife' subgenre, which is always creepy as hell.
- Hannah Priest (@shewolfmanc) December 21, 2017
The theory first starts off with simple points of information that anyone who has ever watched the film before would remember, like how the original Santa is dead. Sad stuff! But it gets a little darker as things move onto the other films in the series.
Priest says that the reason why people keep disappearing from the film is because they're actually being used for the special hot cocoa recipes mentioned throughout the trilogy. She also notes that the elves own a big oven that they don't need, and that's also the reason why no one seems to mourn anyone who leaves or dies during the films. Yikes.
The creepiness begins early on, because the roof-Santa actually dies on screen (quite slowly) and that's the only reason Scott can take on the role.
- Hannah Priest (@shewolfmanc) December 21, 2017
It's not just humans though. Elves disappear after hundreds of years, and NO ONE cares.
- Hannah Priest (@shewolfmanc) December 21, 2017
And let's take a minute to consider Bernard. He's a huge part of SCI & SCII, but he's just... absent in SCIII. Curtis is now 'Elf No. 1' & no one mentions Bernard.
- Hannah Priest (@shewolfmanc) December 21, 2017
In SCII, Curtis & Bernard discover the 'Missus Clause', which dictates that Santa must be married. They'd never heard of this before & the Council of Legendary Figures also know nothing about it.
- Hannah Priest (@shewolfmanc) December 21, 2017
The obvious (and chilling) implication of this is that ALL previous Santas were married at the point when they donned the suit & invoked the Santa Clause. (Or they lasted less than a year before dying/invoking the Escape Clause.)
- Hannah Priest (@shewolfmanc) December 21, 2017
When roof-Santa dies, it's a matter of hours before Scott gets to the North Pole to take over. But there is no sign of recently-bereaved Mrs Claus. What happened to her??
- Hannah Priest (@shewolfmanc) December 21, 2017
60 Santas over the history of Christmas means that the average life expectancy for a Santa is just over 33 years. Some of them will have lived at the North Pole for much longer.
- Hannah Priest (@shewolfmanc) December 21, 2017
So where are the babies? Where are the wives? There are potentially 60 women unaccounted for in this film series, and the elves never ever mention them.
- Hannah Priest (@shewolfmanc) December 21, 2017
Why would the elves need a massive oven? Santa delivers toys, not baked goods. Now think about how wryly the elves smile whenever someone comments on the flavour of their cocoa.
- Hannah Priest (@shewolfmanc) December 21, 2017
And that, my friends, is why The Santa Clause is the most horrific Christmas film ever made.
- Hannah Priest (@shewolfmanc) December 21, 2017
While chances are Disney will never actually confirm or deny that this theory is true or not, it's a safe bet that none of this is actually what the creators intended. Most likely, the writers just hoped viewers wouldn't read too much into some of the missing details.
Priest has even had to block notifications, as she keeps getting messages saying that she ruined the movie for some people. Well, Christmas might not be completely ruined, but one thing is for certain, The Santa Clause and its sequels might never be seen the same again.
For fans who feel like they can rewatch The Santa Clause trilogy, even after reading this theory, all three movies are now available to watch on Netflix.
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