‘The Voice’ Premiere: Gwen and Blake, Sitting in Red Seats, K-I-S-S-I-N-G

Greetings, and welcome back to Season 12 of The Gwen & Blake Show. Oops, I mean Season 12 of The Voice, of course.

In case you’ve been living under a Wi-Fi-free rock — or at least many miles away from the nearest gossip magazine stand — then you are well aware that Gwen Stefani and Blake Shelton, who met cute on the set of The Voice while going through high-profile divorces from their respective high-profile spouses, are now a hot-and-heavy item. At first their relationship just seemed like tabloid fodder or a rebound fling, but now it appears to be, to quote one of Gwen’s own songs, the real thing. So of course NBC has been taking full advantage of their coupling, running Valentine-themed “Feel the Love” promos for Season 12 and loading up Monday’s premiere episode with lovey-dovey “Gwake” (or is it “Blen”?) moments. (I will assume that the vibe is very different on the set of The Voice UK, on which Gwen’s ex, Gavin Rossdale, is currently a coach.)

For instance: On Monday, Gwen batted her Gwen Stefani for Urban Decay false lashes at Blake shamelessly, tried to prove she has country cred by bragging about how many Blake concerts she’s been to in the last year, and even sat on Blake’s lap more than once — all while Adam Levine griped about it being “weird” and feeling like a “third wheel.” (Perhaps Adam is mildly disgruntled that Gwen and Blake’s showmance has deflected attention from his longtime onscreen bromance with Blake.)

But all this Gwen/Blake hoopla just might help the fiercely competitive Adam get an edge on this season’s competition and catch up with his nemesis Blake’s track record. (For those keeping track at home, Blake has five wins; Adam has three.) Why? Because it seems like now that Blake has his eye on Gwen, his eye is off the Voice prize. Blake championed Gwen multiple times Monday night, and at one point, when he and Gwen were the only two coaches in the running for a particularly promising (and country-leaning!) young contestant, he didn’t even put up a fight, practically handing the contestant right over to his beaming girlfriend. “What happened to you, Blake? Are you OK?” exclaimed Adam. You can bet that Adam will take full advantage of this softy situation down the road.

I do admit, the focus on The Voice’s cutest couple since Midas Whale didn’t bug me as much as I’d expected. Gwake’s shtick could get old fast, yes. But perhaps, like Blake, I’ve lost my edge, because I found it all a little sweet — in small doses. I’m happy for those two crazy kids.

And thankfully, while Monday’s truly impressive contestants were few and far between, there was some great talent in small doses, too. Below are the contestants that made it through Monday’s Blind Auditions. Watch and feel the love.

JChosen

This 29-year-old special needs teacher from Georgia delivered a predictable performance of Marvin Gaye’s “Sexual Healing” — every Voice season has a competent but old-fashioned throwback-R&B belter like this guy — that I didn’t think quite deserved the season’s prime opening slot or a four-chair turn. But the coaches clearly were feeling the love here. Alicia Keys was making so many crazy Winona-Ryder-at-the-SAG-Awards facial expressions, I am sure the Interweb is already teeming with GIFs of her over-the-top reaction. Adam was additionally jumping out of his chair and claiming he “wouldn’t be able to sleep tonight” if he wasn’t chosen by JChosen. Blake called JChosen “pitch-perfect.” Really, Gwen was the only coach who didn’t go in for the hard sell. So… why did JChosen shockingly go for Gwen? She seemed as surprised as anyone. But she just might be the coach to give JChosen some much-needed modern, edgy flair.

MEMBER OF: Team Gwen

Lauren Duski

This adorkable 25-year-old Michigan girl comes from a family of dentists, and she definitely had a smile that lit up the small screen this Monday. Now residing in Nashville and pursuing country music, she crooned a slowed-down version of genre-hopper Jewel’s “You Were Meant for Me” that seemed perfectly suited to her pop/indie/country aesthetic. (You may recall that Jewel started off as a alternative/folk type, before segueing pretty effortlessly into country and even becoming a judge on Nashville Star.) Lauren’s rendition made Jewel’s breakup song even sadder and more wistful, putting the focus on its lonely lyrics; her sumptuous voice reminded me a bit of Season 4’s Sarah Simmons or the Americana side of Season 10 winner Alisan Porter.

“You really took that [song] to a new place,” said Adam, one of three coaches who turned. “You’re somebody who clearly can win this thing… I want to work with people who can be a star,” said Blake. Gwen oddly said something like “There is no boundaries,” which just gave me bad flashbacks to the bad coronation song Kara DioGuardi penned for Kris Allen on American Idol Season 8. So of course, Lauren picked Blake. “Now I gotta go make up with Gwen,” Blake grumbled. But since Gwen quickly added, “I pick Blake too,” it didn’t seem like there were any hard feelings here.

MEMBER OF: Team Blake

Johnny Hayes

This 29-year-old Alabama shaggy landscaper/country boy supposedly auditioned last season. I have absolutely no recollection of him. But his cover of Otis Redding’s “Try a Little Tenderness,” inspired by his first date with his wife, was rather memorable. Johnny had a salt-of-the-earth thing going on, and a pleasingly reedy rasp. He almost sounded like a hybrid of Adam and Blake, if that makes sense. But it was Adam and Gwen who actually turned around. Gwen spent most of her time making goo-goo eyes at Blake, while Blake argued on her behalf instead. It’s no wonder that Adam, who said Johnny “did the almost impossible” by nailing an Otis classic, won this round. Johnny wasn’t quite as smitten with Gwen’s fluttering eyelashes as Blake was.

MEMBER OF: Team Adam

Anatalia Villaranda

This pint-sized 16-year-old, who you may remember from the final season of American Idol, was giving me kiddie-pageant vibes from the very start. (Her stage mother was a bit of an annoyance during Idol Season 15’s Hollywood Week.) A choir-groomed karaoke princess and former teen group member with her huge, boisterous family in tow, she seemed too precious and precocious at first. But then I was impressed by her sassy, growly performance of Bruno Mars’s “Runaway Baby” — very Jacqui Lee circa Season 5. She might have been trying too hard, but there was no denying her confidence or that big voice coming out of her teeny 4-foot-9 body. “A lot of people turn that energy into a colossal trainwreck, but you turned it into, ‘No, I’m gonna keep beating you down!’” raved Blake. Eventually Anatalia turned all four chairs. Adam told her, “The greatness that you have is something you can’t teach.” Alicia praised Anatalia for being “unafraid to express herself.” Gwen played the fashion card, bribing Anatalia with promises of dress-up sessions and shopping trips. Anatalia wisely went with Alicia, a former teen star herself who did very well last season with another sassy young lady, Wé McDonald. There is potential here, if Alicia can bring out more subtleties in Anatalia.

MEMBER OF: Team Alicia

Stephanie Rice

This 27-year-old Texarkana songstress was my favorite contestant of the night. She certainly had the most compelling backstory. A preacher’s daughter, she was disowned years ago by her father when she came out as a lesbian. Her performance, of Kelly Clarkson’s gut-punch ballad “Piece by Piece” — a heartbreaking but ultimately hopeful account of parental abandonment — therefore had incredible impact and heart. While the effect wasn’t quite as magical as when a pregnant Kelly sang it through tears on Idol last year (Stephanie’s voice was garbled and affected in parts, and Kelly is tough for anyone to top), this was still very special. Stephanie was giving me tender Brandi Carlile vibes, and she was clearly feeling this.

“The way you sang that song, it’s like you wrote it,” said Blake. “I was really moved. I can feel whatever pain is in there … you can only sing like that if you’ve lived it,” said Gwen. Interestingly, only Blake and Gwen turned around and, as Adam awkwardly put it, started “going at it.” But Blake didn’t fight Gwen too hard on this. I feel Stephanie might have been better off with a country coach, but maybe Gwen’s gentle, motherly touch will be just what she needs right now.

MEMBER OF: Team Gwen

Mark Isaiah

This 19-year-old was once shy, insecure, and overweight, but apparently winning a Justin Bieber-sponsored talent contest five years ago changed his life and gave him confidence. Who knew the Biebs could do so much good? Now Mark is destined to be the teen-dream heartthrob of Season 12. While his by-the-book cover of Shawn Mendes’s “Mercy” wasn’t exactly original, he exhibited some Nick Jonas-like pop-star charisma and an interesting smoky tone. Even host Carson Daly, standing in the wings, couldn’t help but blurt out, “That kid’s a star!” Gwen later gushed, “I’m honestly surprised you’re not signed yet. Your voice sounds so modern. It sounds like radio!” Blake chimed in, “You’re meant to be on Gwen’s team.” But Mark went with a fellow heartthrob, Adam. Maybe the nation’s smitten moms and daughters can mass-vote for Adam and Mark together. If so, this kid will be unstoppable.

MEMBER OF: Team Adam

Brennley Brown

This season, in a blatant and maybe desperate attempt to court that ever-elusive, television-shunning millennial demographic, The Voice lowered its already-low age limit from 15 to 13. This could be irksome — why not let the adults do their thing, and air a Voice Kids U.S. spinoff instead? — but Brennley, the first youngster of the season to take advantage of this new rule, showed promise. Yes, the 14-year-old farm girl, who sang “Stupid Boy” by Keith Urban, had a voice that was thin and trebly. But she did sound distinctive, and she’s young and pliable, so with proper coaching, her bad habits could be fixed. Alicia played the age card (“I understand how hard it is as a young woman artist”) and mentioned her recent duet with Cam at the 2016 ACM Honors (she’s since wowed in a Grammy Awards duet with another country singer, Maren Morris). But then Blake had his mic-drop moment when he said, “I have never been a guest artist at a country concert — because I am the country concert!” Oh, snap. Blake also told Brennley, a fan of old-school country artists like Willie Nelson and Merge Haggard, “If there is somebody else up and down this line who can help you make your mark on country music, I don’t know who else that is.” Brennley’s decision was clear. (“I had to go with my roots,” she later explained.) Maybe she can now follow in the cowgirl-booted footsteps of successful Team Blake country teens like RaeLynn and Danielle Bradbery.

MEMBER OF: Team Blake

Felicia Temple

A 28-year-old New Jersey nurse and triumphant cancer survivor, Felicia sure cleaned up nice, ditching the medical scrubs for glamorous diva-wear and Veronica Lake hair-waves as she hit the stage to powerfully belt Etta James’s “All I Could Do Is Cry.” Alicia was the first of three coaches to spin around, and the two bonded later when it was revealed that Felicia once earned the nickname “Felicia Keys” from playing Alicia’s songs at various talent shows. Adam then suggested an “impromptu” duet between Felicia and Alicia — and right on cue, the two ladies joined hands and crooned “Fallin’” together like they’d been rehearsing it for weeks. This may or may not have been staged, but it was awesome; it already felt like a finale-night performance. Felicia made her obvious choice while Alicia was still standing on the stage; the other two coaches hypothetically in the running, Gwen and Blake, almost didn’t even try. Well, at least Gwen and Blake still have each other. But Alicia may have the contestant who’ll win Season 12.

MEMBER OF: Team Alicia

Come back Tuesday, for more Blind Auditions and, of course, more Gwen/Blake sappiness. There may also be trouble in paradise, as NBC promos show the two lovebirds “going at it” over one coveted contestant. This could be interesting. See you then!

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