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Human Heads in Cargo: Craziest Things Smuggled Through Customs

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Updated Fri, July 18, 2014 at 11:00 AM UTC

Tickle me, smuggler — Nobody would ever suspect a “Sesame Street” character of shenanigans. Maybe that’s why a California couple chose to hide two live parrots inside an Elmo doll as theyattemptedto cross the U.S.-Mexico border on July 1 into San Luis, Arizona. Border officials subjected the couple to a search upon finding they had brought back mangoes with seeds — a no-no. The X-ray machine then revealed the birds inside the toy “chirping away.” The exotic avian travelers were placed in quarantine, and the unnamed couple was fined $300. The fruit was thrown out.

Very fishy behavior — Hiding sea life in your pockets is not a perfect plan: A man who had flown from Australia to Auckland, New Zealand, last summer raised suspicions when his pants pockets sprang a leak. The traveler said it was water he had carried from the plane, but customs officials weren’t buying it: They found seven live, tropical fish in liquid-filled plastic bags stashed in his trousers. Even if the fish were allowed into the country, the sea creatures would face strict quarantines, according to theMirror. The passenger, who said he had brought them for a friend, faced potential fines of up to $78,000, reported the Mirror.

Heads will roll at customs — It sounds like a plot from a horror film: When 18 severed human heads arrived at Chicago’s O'Hare Airport from Rome without the proper paperwork in 2012, the unclaimed cargo made headlines. Although ghoulish, the shipment of severed heads apparently wasn’t as nefarious as one might think. The specimens had been sent to Italy for medical research and were then returned to Illinois for cremation, according to the Chicago Sun-Times. “There’s no issue with the transportation of body parts for medical purposes,” Brian Bell, a spokesman for the U.S. Department of Homeland Security, told the Sun-Times. “There’s nothing against the law that says you cannot ship them, provided you have the right documentation.” Finally, a crematorium rightfully claimed the craniums.

Is that a sparrow in your suitcase? — Bird poop was the tip-off: A man who flew from Vietnam to Los Angeles International Airport in 2009 was arrested when officials spotted the feathers and telltale bird droppings on his shoes — and found 14 songbirds tied to his legs. The photo of the birds attached to Sony Dong’s calves like Christmas ornaments caused a feathered frenzy on the Web. Authorities had tracked Dong after he abandoned a bird-filled suitcase at LAX the year before, according to NBC Los Angeles. This time, they were ready to nab the birdman. “We actually have a handful of individuals which are on our list of most-wanted smugglers,” Joe Johns, U.S. attorney for the Los Angeles Environmental Crimes Unit, told the local NBC station. “Let’s face it; if it has fur, feathers, wings, scales, gills, or fangs, there is someone out there who wants to collect it or wear it or eat it.” The songbirds that survived the ordeal now sing their tunes at the San Diego Zoo.

Flying squirrels, turtles, and a crocodile—oh, my! — This story really pushes the law of the jungle. In 2007, a man traveling from Thailand to Hong Kong was caught with a suitcase filled with endangered species. The unidentified man carried in his smuggler’s valise rare and endangered species that included 46 turtles and tortoises, 11 flying squirrels, 6 snakes, and 1 live crocodile. The animals were apparently destined for China to be used as food and in alternative medicine. “He would have gotten away with it, too, if it weren’t for the cries of a travelling zoo ringing out from his luggage,” noted CNN.

One heckuva hat trick — Passengers on a Spirit Airlines flight from Florida to New York in 2007 ratted out a fellow traveler when they noticed a monkey climbing out from under the man’s hat. The fist-sized marmoset had apparently gone undetected with his human companion from Lima, Peru, and managed to escape notice during a seven-hour layover in Fort Lauderdale, Florida. The stowaway had to undergo a month-long quarantine and then head to a new home: a zoo.

‘Operation Flying Turtle" is a go. — As we said before, smuggling is big business. So it was no small feat when officials at LAX brought down a turtle-smuggling ring. Two Japanese men were caught in 2011 carrying 50 live, rare turtles hidden inside cookie boxes. The investigation had begun the previous year, when U.S. Fish and Wildlife officials alerted local authorities to the black market turtles. The law enforcement effort, aka “Operation Flying Turtle,” included the U.S. Postal Inspection Service, U.S. Immigration and Customs Enforcement’s Homeland Security Investigations, and U.S. Customs and Border Protection, the L.A. Times reported. “The plundering and smuggling of rare plants and animals to satisfy the desires of hobbyists is not only shameful, in some circumstances it can pose a threat to public safety and the environment,” Claude Arnold, special agent in charge of ICE’s Homeland Security Investigations in Los Angeles, told the Times.

TSA on the Case — Bear repellent, really? Those people policing the amount of toothpaste you can carry on the plane catch a lot more than that. The Transportation Security Administration’s (TSA) Instagram account shares photos of some of the wacky items confiscated at security — including, yes, eight ounces of bear repellent found at the Phoenix airport. This week, the TSA noted on its blog that airports around the country found 35 loaded firearms, 74 credit card knives, and an inert grenade. “Please keep in mind that if an item looks like a real bomb, grenade, mine, etc., it is prohibited,” the TSA wrote. Fair enough.

Tickle me, smuggler

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Nobody would ever suspect a “Sesame Street” character of shenanigans. Maybe that’s why a California couple chose to hide two live parrots inside an Elmo doll as theyattemptedto cross the U.S.-Mexico border on July 1 into San Luis, Arizona. Border officials subjected the couple to a search upon finding they had brought back mangoes with seeds — a no-no. The X-ray machine then revealed the birds inside the toy “chirping away.” The exotic avian travelers were placed in quarantine, and the unnamed couple was fined $300. The fruit was thrown out.

And you thought forgetting to toss that half-full bottled water was bad. In February, border officials at Heathrow Airport’s Terminal 5 discovered 13 San Salvador rock iguanas stuffed into socks and packed into a suitcase.

Native to the Bahamas, the endangered lizards were illegally transported by two “highly intelligent, well-travelled” young women, according to the Telegraph. The animals have an estimated black market value of more than $444,000.

Of the 13 rare creatures — just a few hundred are believed to exist — 12 survived the flight from the Bahamas to London. To prevent any further casualties, the dozen were upgraded from cargo to coach for their British Airways flight back to their native habitat on July 9. No word on what movie they watched.

This is just one of the many strange items that brazen travelers have tried to sneak across international borders. From a mischievous monkey, to human heads, here are some of the bizarre things people have tried to smuggle through customs.

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