'Mad Men' Series Finale Recap: There's No Place Like Om

Warning: This recap contains storyline and character spoilers for the series finale of Mad Men.

So Don Draper finally found contentment on a California cliffside… but would he like to buy the world a Coke?

The final episode of Mad Men didn’t end with a Sopranos-esque cut to black, but it did leave us on a somewhat ambiguous note: Don meditating at a hippie retreat, chanting “Ommmm,” a slight smile creeping across his face. Then it cuts directly to the iconic 1971 Coca-Cola TV commercial, “I’d Like to Buy the World a Coke.” Then: Credits.

So did Don go back to the dreaded McCann-Erickson (the ad agency that really did make that ad, by the way) and dream up one of the most memorable ad campaigns of all time? We’ll never know for sure… but it sure seems that way.

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But we’re getting ahead of ourselves. Let’s go back and revisit the highlights of this often confounding, often exhilarating final episode.

Betty and Sally

Don calls Sally again from the road, but she’s distracted; she finally caves and tells him about Betty’s terminal cancer diagnosis, even though she wasn’t supposed to. Don then makes a “person to person” call to a clearly ailing Betty. He offers to take care of the boys, but Betty’s already decided that her brother and his wife will take them in: “Please don’t let your pride interfere with my wishes.”

When Don tries to fight her, Betty points out that Don doesn’t see the boys much as it is: “I want to keep things as normal as possible… and you not being here is part of that.” (Oof.) After they exchange a tear-choked silence (“Birdie…” “I know.”), they hang up. The last time we ever see mother and daughter, Sally’s washing dishes while Betty is (ugh) still smoking at the Francis kitchen table. (Hey, she can’t get lung cancer twice, right?)

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Joan

Joan’s enjoying her post-McCann life, vacationing in Key West and doing bumps of cocaine with her new man Richard. (Joan’s reaction to her first sniff: “I feel like someone just gave me some very good news!” Slow down, Joanie!)

Richard impulsively proposes, but she’s happy just being with him for now. She doesn’t stay out of the rat race for long, though: Ken approaches her with an offer to produce industrial films for Dow, which turns out to be easy money, and she ropes Peggy into writing them for her on the side.

After their first film goes over well, Joan tells Peggy she wants to do this full-time, with Peggy as her partner. And we’ve been rooting for these two to start their own firm for years, so we can’t tell how excited we got when we heard these two little words:

Joan gives Peggy a great sales pitch: “We won’t answer to anyone.” But Peggy’s not immediately onboard; she needs time to think about it. And while she contemplates that, Richard throws Joan a curveball: He doesn’t like the idea of her starting a new business, because he wants her full attention. But Joan’s waited too long for this kind of opportunity; rather than give up her new business venture, she lets Richard walk out of her life.

Our last sight of Joan is in her dining room, which she’s turned into a makeshift office, with her former babysitter answering the phone:

Eat your heart out, Richard. And Jim Hobart. And Herb from Jaguar. And every other sexist pig Joan had to endure on this show.

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Peggy and Stan

Peggy’s not really thrilled to be lost in a sea of copywriters at McCann, and Joan’s offer does intrigue her, so she runs it by Stan. But he doesn’t understand why she’d want to start a whole new career and walk away from her “rare talent.” She thanks him by snapping at him, telling him he has “no ambition” and calling him “a failure.” He leaves hurt, telling her, “There’s more to life than work.” (Like… romance, perhaps?)

Thankfully, we do get one more Don and Peggy scene — but it’s over the phone, as Don calls her from his hippie retreat. She’s pissed at him for going AWOL: “What are you even doing?” He doesn’t have much of an answer: “I don’t know. I have no idea.” She says what we’ve all been thinking (and screaming at the TV) for weeks now:

But he’s feeling sorry for himself: “I messed everything up. I’m not the man you think I am.” He grimly confesses all his sins to her, and adds, “I only called because… I realized I never said goodbye to you.” Peggy’s concerned that Don’s going to hurt himself and tries to keep him on the line, but he hangs up on her.

Peggy calls Stan, worried sick about Don — and she apologizes for yelling at him earlier. She tells him she’s decided to stay at McCann, and he says he’s glad, leading to a roundabout profession of love that starts with “Every time I’m face-to-face with you, I want to strangle you” and ends with “All I want to do is be with you… I love you, Peggy.”

Peggy’s befuddled at first — she adorably says “What?!?” about a hundred times — and eventually comes around with, “I think I’m in love with you, too.”

Finally, the moment that all you Stan-Peggy shippers have been waiting for:

The final shot of these two: Peggy typing away at McCann, while Stan rubs her shoulders. All we can say is: Why’d they wait this long?

Don

The finale opens with Don still on his cross-country vision quest, racing cars in the Utah desert and sleeping with another anonymous blonde. But after he hears about Betty, he hitches a ride… not back to New York, but to L.A. to see Anna’s niece Stephanie. When she asks what he’s been up to, he has an interesting answer:

Oh, really? Bet Jim Hobart would love to hear more about that.

But things aren’t going great for Stephanie; the kid she was pregnant with earlier this season now lives with his father. Don tries to give Stephanie back Anna’s ring to help her out, but she sees right through him: “I’m pretty sure you’re the one who’s in trouble.” She’s going to some retreat up the coast — which turns out to be the famous Esalen institute, in Big Sur — and brings Don along with her.

At first, Don’s cynical about the hippie-dippy atmosphere, which leads to some great sight gags, like Don smoking a cigarette while people do tai chi around him, and this old woman shoving him during a silent communication exercise:

But things get serious when Stephanie opens up in group therapy about her feelings of guilt and judgment, and she ends up running off, leaving Don stuck there without a car. After talking with Peggy, Don’s near-catatonic, and reluctantly joins one more group therapy session.

But something clicks with him when a sad sack named Leonard starts talking about how unloved he feels: “It’s like no one cares that I’m gone.” It’s a light-bulb moment for Don; when Leonard breaks down in tears, Don walks over to hug him, sobbing himself.

Finally, we see Don in full lotus pose, chanting on the hillside… and maybe dreaming up one last big pitch.

Mad Men Memos:

* Roger gets a happy ending: His romp with Marie turns into a full-fledged love affair that ends in marriage (we see them cuddling together in a French-Canadian café), and he makes peace with Joan, too, offering to take care of Kevin financially. We’re just sorry the guy’s not making witty quips in English anymore.

* Pete Campbell gets a happy ending, too, boarding a Lear jet with his wife Trudy (looking more glamorous than ever) and their daughter, en route to a new life in Wichita. Not that Pete deserved a happy ending… but hey, we’re feeling generous.

* The finale kept with Mad Men tradition and brought in a number of familiar faces as guest stars: Wilfred’s Fiona Gubelmann, as Don’s Utah fling; Brett Gelman, who sat in plenty of group therapy circles on Go On, as the nudist retreat attendee; and Supergirl herself, Helen Slater, as the kind woman who invited Don back to the circle in time for his spiritual awakening.

* Don’s secretary Meredith is so chipper, she doesn’t even let getting fired spoil her mood! We agree with Roger: She’ll land on her feet. “I always do!”

* Guess we’ll never find out what happened to: Sal Romano; Bob Benson; Michael Ginsberg and his one remaining nipple; Peggy’s dinner date Stevie (poor guy…); Dawn; Bobbie Barrett; Grandma Ida; Midge Daniels; Peggy and Pete’s baby; Father Gill; Peggy’s lesbian pal Joyce; Miss Farrell; Dr. Faye Miller; Paul Kinsey and his Star Trek spec script; Jim Cutler; Abe (did he survive that stabbing?); Scout’s Honor; Chauncey the dog; Glen Bishop’s tour in Vietnam; and Don’s sombrero.